Изображения страниц
PDF
EPUB

Club. The proposal was agreed to, and there was a loud cry for Mr. Oakley. Mr. Oakley accordingly rose, and was hailed by universal acclamation. As soon as there was once more a prospect of being heard, Mr. Oakley proceeded to return thanks for the office conferred upon him.

[ocr errors]

Gentlemen,-You are quite mistaken in your ideas: you have given me this employment, because you think I delight in objection and opposition ;— here I beg leave to contradict you all: if you ask whether I accept this duty, I again reply-No! I have a few objections of my own-(Laughter)— which I shall bring forward in due time, but I never will stoop to coincide in those of another"—(Hear, hear, hear.)

With these words Mr. Oakley pushed the bag and its contents to his next neighbour, Mr. Lozell, who refused it, observing, that he could not but agree in what had fallen from his Hon. Friend. Mr. Rowley observed that it was too bitter a dish for him; and Mr. Musgrave assured the Meeting that he would never run his coach that road; Mr. Burton made some remarks on the price of the material of which the Bag was composed; and Sir F. Wentworth avowed a strong dislike of Green Bags in general. Finally, that the business of the Meeting might not be longer interrupted, the Hon. G. Montgomery agreed to press the objections.

OPENING OF THE GREEN BAG.

The Hon. G. MONTGOMERY, after inspecting one of the letters, informed the Club that he held in his hand a communication from Amicus, on the subject of an article contained in our last Number-he meant “ The Visit to Eton." Amicus found fault with the insertion of this article, upon the ground that it purported to come from a gentleman who had not been brought up at Eton. Amicus commented strongly upon the inconsistency of mentioning in one page that support could only be received from gentlemen who had been brought up at Eton, while in another we departed from the restriction by accepting assistance from old Wiccamist.

Mr. M. STERLING defended the Article in the following manner :*** Gentlemen,Of The Visit to Eton,' to which this gentleman objects, I am the author. I must confess when I wrote that paper I had no idea that such an objection would be urged, since it has been the practice of all periodical writers to write under any signature they think fit. It is needless to multiply examples of this license, since the periodical writers who have set us this example must be familiar to every one's recollection.-(No, from Mr. Oakley.) It must be evident to you, Gentlemen, how very confined bur range of topics would be, if every article were written in the character of an Etonian. (Hear, hear.)

A

Mr. MUSGRAVE hoped that no such restriction would be adopted, as he had by him a Letter from the Guard of the Devonshire Subscription, which, under the proposed regulation, would become inadmissible.

(

Mr. O'CONNOR, in a strong brogue, observed that he had been preparing a sentimental paper-(Loud laughter.)—signed Amelia Araminta, and hoped the said paper would not be rejected, because the said Amelia had not been educated at Eton.-(Laughter.)

* Sir F. WENTWORTH was heard to say something on the subject of ex post

facto laws, but the Hon. Bart. was immediately stopped by cries of order, order!

Mr. PEREGRINE COURTENAY then put a stop to the discussion by stating that he was sure Amicus, on a re-consideration of the subject, would perceive that although the work is strictly confined to the writings of Etonians, it is of course allowed them to write under whatever signature or character they think fit. (Hear, hear!)

Mr. MONTGOMERY next read a letter from "Oxoniensis," informing the Club that it was the general opinion that "The Etonian" was principally supported by auxiliaries from the Universities.

Mr. PEREGRINE COURTENAY said, that in order to prevent misapprehension upon this point, he would state the limits which he had assigned to foreign contributions. They had hitherto been restricted to twenty pages, and he did not intend they should exceed that number.

Mr. MONTGOMERY next produced a letter from Cambridge, signed "An Etonian," containing some animadversions on several parts of No. 1. The first of these was a censure of the Anachronisms in "The Eve of Battle." Our Correspondent remarks with some force upon the inconsistency of the mixture of steel-bound hands" with "Blues" and "bayonets ;" and points out the impropriety of placing "Allan the Moss-trooper" in the same epoch with "Cribb" and "Tattersall's." He is also somewhat severe upon the usage of "unpeels," which, he observes, is to be found "neither in the Slang, or Johnson's Dictionary." He next notices the error of "rouge et blanc ;" and finally enters into an argument upon the nickname "Swab," which he maintains to be the nickname Oblique; whereas we have brought it forward as a specimen of the nickname Direct.

Mr. Montgomery having concluded, the President briefly replied to the arguments of "An Etonian." He would willingly admit that "The Eve of Battle," strictly analyzed, presented throughout a mass of absurdity and inconsistency; the very idea of discovering such a diversity of characters, lying side by side in such a situation, presented at once a glaring impossibility. But as the situation of a field of battle was merely chosen as a vehicle for the introduction of characters, he considered the above-mentioned errors venial, though not perhaps justifiable, faults. "Unpeels" vice "peels" was evidently a slip of the pen, but not metri gratia, as our correspondent imagined, since nothing could have been more easy than the alteration of the name which precedes it. Rouge et "Blanc" was an inaccuracy of a similar kind; our friends are requested to substitute with their pens "noir" for "blanc." The objection relating to the Nick-name "Swab," Mr. Courtenay considered too insignificant for notice. The President concluded, by expressing his obligations, as Editor, to "An Etonian," for his good wishes and good opinion.

Mr. Montgomery was proceeding to select another letter, when Mr. Musgrave remarked, that this seemed a strange long stage, and the Passengers were all falling asleep. Mr. Lozell begged leave to coincide with his Honourable Friend's sentiments. Mr. Oakley then made the following harangue, which had at least the effect of waking "the Passengers"

Gentlemen,-I don't beg leave to speak, like my friend Lozell; because I have a right to speak, and what is more, I will speak.- (Hear, hear.)-Nor do I "coincide" with my Hon. Friend's (Mr. Musgrave) sentiments. I differ from him on both points.—(Laughter, and cries of hear, hear.)—If you think I'm to be upset (Hear, from Mr. Musgrave.)-by ridicule, I differ from you there.-(Hear, hear.)-If you think-(Cries of Go on-go on.)-If you think I'm going to "go on" at your bidding, I'm sorry for you -and I differ from you there."

The Honourable Gentleman sat down amidst loud and continued plaudits; at the close of which the President rose and spoke as follows :

"Gentlemen,-I believe it is your wish that the letters I have laid before you should be disposed of in a speedier manner than can be accomplished, as we are at present proceeding;-I will therefore briefly mention to you the scope and tendency of the remainder of these communications, few of which require a serious answer; indeed our correspondents for the most part are in their opinions so perfectly dissimilar, that the expressions of one not unfrequently form a reply to the expressions of another. The first I take up is an admonitory Epistle from Chancery-lane, signed Thales; its object is to recommend less levity, and more sound principle in our succeeding Numbers. The next is from A Fourth Form;' he hopes to see no more prosy essays, and plenty of Slang' from Mr. Musgrave."

Mr. Musgrave swore " A Fourth From" drove good cattle; and F. Wentworth was sure that if our young well-wisher would come to the next Meeting, every member of the Club would give him his Liberty.

The President then continued:

"The Shade of Addison' wishes Poetry to be excluded; 'Philomusus' expresses the same wish with regard to Prose. A Midnight Taper' disapproves of the careless manner in which the King of Clubs composes; and a Landscape Painter' advises us to remove the Robes of his Fusticular Majesty from our cover. These,' remarked the Chairman," are the only objections to our Work which we have received; and from these it must be obvious to you that the First Number of "The Etonian,' as a whole, has experienced very general approbation. This approbation I do not attribute to the merit of the contents, but to the principles on which it is founded.(Hear, hear, hear.)—Our only aim is to exert our utmost abilities for the reputation of Eton, and the amusement of her alumni: the event has been as I expected. The condescension of our Superiors, and the good-nature of our Equals, have alike looked with partiality on our undertaking.—(Loud cheers.)-I will now detain you no longer on this topic-"

Here the worthy Chairman was interrupted by Mr. Oakley, who observed that his objections had not yet been heard.-He then proceeded to deliver them in the following manner :

MR. OAKLEY'S AVOWED PREDILECTION FOR TEA.

"Gentlemen,―The first point to which I shall call your attention, is a manifest indecorum in the proceedings of the King of Clubs. I allude to the Punch-bowl.(Murmurs.)—Do not mistake me I love Punch,~(Hear,

hear),—for there is in it the spirit of contradiction.-(Laughter.)—The ingredients all oppose each other :

"For when a bowl of Punch we make,

Four striking opposites we take."

"But," Gentlemen, " much as I admire Punch in private, I disapprove of it altogether in public. It may be all very well in Manuscript, but it will will never do in Print.-(Murmurs.)-You differ from me, gentlemen, but I repeat, it will never do. I propose, as a substitute, a cup of tea.—(Ungovernable laughter.)—You think me a fool, gentlemen !—(Loud cries of hear, hear.)—All I say is, I differ from you.—(Hear.)—I will bring forward arguments. Tea is a wholesome Beverage; Punch is not. Tea is a Classical Beverage; Punch is not.—(The Hon. G. Montgomery intimated his dissent.) Punch, gentlemen, is a mere modern invention; Tea has been celebrated by Romans. I cannot conclude my address better than by quoting the beautiful panegyric pronounced on Tea by Horace; in which you will find that our own country is particularly alluded to, as addicted to this admirable potation : Te, fontium qui celat origines,

[ocr errors]

Nilusque, et Ister, Te rapidus Tigris,

Te belluosus qui remotis

Obstrepit Oceanus Britannis,

Te non paventis funera Galliæ,

Duræque tellus audit Iberiæ;

Te cæde gaudentes Sicambri

Compositis venerantur armis.'”

Mr. GOLIGHTLY said, as the Hon. Gentleman had set the example of quoting, he would give him—

"Non tecum possum vivere.". The Honourable Speaker was proceeding, when he was cut short by Mr. Musgrave, who declared, that if the drivers persisted in booking Latin and Greek Passengers, to the manifest annoyance of all Christians in the Coach, he should feel it his duty to submit a proposition to the proprietors for the exaction of a fine for every Heathenish Passenger.

"Vina fere dulces oluerunt mane Camænæ."

Mr. A. M'FARLANE considered Punch so good a thing that he should be loth to abandon it for 66 ony thing but whiskey."

Mr. MONTGOMERY assured the Meeting, that in the event of the adoption of Tea, there would be a sensible deterioration in his style.

Mr. BURTON hoped the Hon. Gentleman would not continue to press his motion, as it had presented him so unexpected a product. He had observed a falling of at least fifty per cent. in the spirits of the Meeting since Mr. Oakley's proposal.

Mr. O'CONNOR had no idea there had been such a fall in the price of spirits. —(A laugh.)—In the event of a change in the Club Beverage he said a few words in recommendation of Hot Pot.

Mr. A. LE BLANC gave an explanation of the various effects of the two Auids upon the brain; we have not leisure to follow him in his discussion, particularly as it was so wrapped up in science, that we could not perfectly

understand to which he assigned the preference. (Mr. Le Blanc was stopped by loud cries of Question; in the midst of which the Chairman rose and ob served, that the motion had not been seconded; it was therefore abandoned amidst general applause.)

The PRESIDENT said he had now only to inform the Meeting that the Second Number of "The Etonian" would appear on Wednesday, November 15, nearly a week before its day.—(Hear, hear, hear.)

ELECTION OF SIR THOMAS NESBIT.

Mr. GOLIGHTLY, pursuant to notice given at the commencement of the proceedings, rose to propose that Sir THOMAS NESBIT be admitted to take the Oath of Allegiance, and henceforward to enjoy all privileges and immunities to which a liege subject of our Lord the King is entitled. This, reader, is our form of electing a new Member.

Halt! I must resume my Brush and Pallet, and give you, previous to the Ballot, a rough sketch of Sir THOMAS NESBIT. Yet, in preparing my outline, I am much at a loss how or where to begin; for every feature in the character of Sir Thomas is so distinct from its neighbour, that I am afraid of losing the expression of one while I am heightening the effect of another. With his father I was unacquainted, so that I cannot go back to the days of his boyhood, nor describe to you the education which has produced so whimsical and so amusing a composition of eccentricities. I know him only as an Etonian, and as such only I can describe him. He is then, for the time being, the leader or chief of a new sect, which has of late years gained an extensive footing in our little world! I mean that sect, which, by a studied, or sometimes by a natural, roughness of demeanour, and by an assiduous attention to the proper cultivation of slang, has merited and obtained the denomination "Burgee." I must say, however the pursuits of these gentlemen may be at variance with rigid discipline, however they may offend the over-nice tastes of some of their companions, I never yet found any harm in a "Bargee." He is generally possessed of firm integrity, and of inexhaustible good-humour; and the venial errors of a light head and an inconsiderate temper, are, in my estimation, fully compensated by the advantages of an open heart and warm feeling. To sum up his merits, in behalf of an oppressed schoolfellow he will often encounter an antagonist, at the sight of whom the cheek of the sap would grow much paler than it has already become from study, and the jaw of the intimidated Exquisite would chatter within its fence of neckcloth. But Sir Thomas Nesbit is sitting for his picture, and I must waste no more time.

Sir Thomas, as I before observed, is the chief of the class I have been describing, and it is fit he should be so. I do not allude so much to his acquirements in the necessary accomplishments, for in these he has equals, or even superiors. Mr. O'Connor, for instance, has more Brass in his face, more Bass in his voice, than has my good friend, Sir Thomas. But Sir Thomas grounds his pretensions upon the appearance of originality, which he gives by his quaint expression to the oldest conceits; upon the inexhaustible good humour with which he parries the sarcasms of his more

« ПредыдущаяПродолжить »