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S. Ant. (12) What's her name?

S. Dro. Nell, Sir ;-but her name and three quarters (that is, an ell and three quarters) will not measure her from hip to hip.

S. Ant. Then fhe bears fome breadth?

S. Dro. No longer from head to foot, than from hip to hip; fhe is spherical, like a globe: I could find out countries in her.

S. Ant. In what part of her body ftands Ireland?

S. Dro. Marry, Sir, in her buttocks; I found it out by the bogs.

S. Ant. Where Scotland?

S. Dro. I found it out by the barrennefs, hard in the palm of her hand.

S. Ant. (13) Where France?

S. Dro. In her forehead; arm'd and reverted, making war against her heir.

(12) S. Ant. What's her Name?

S. Ant.

S. Dro. Nell, Sir; but her Name is three Quarters ; that is, an Ell and three Quarters, &c.] This Paffage has hitherto lain as perplext and unintelligible, as it is now easy, and truly humourous. If a Conundrum be reftor'd, in fetting it right, who can help it? There are enough befides in our Author, and Ben Jonson, to countenance that current Vice of the Times when this Play appear'd. Nor is Mr. Pope, in the Chastity of his Tafte, to bristle up at Me for the Revival of this Witticism, fince I owe the Correction to the Sagacity of the ingenious Dr. Thirlby.

(13) S. Ant. Where France?

S. Dro. In her Forehead; arm'd and reverted, making War against her Hair.] All the other Countries, mention'd in this Defcription, are in Dromio's Replies fatirically characteriz❜d: but here, as the Editors have order'd it, no Remark is made upon France; nor any Reason given, why it fhould be in her Forehead but only the Kitchen-wench's high Forehead is rallied, as pushing back her Hair. Thus all the modern Editions ; but the firft Folio reads ·making War against her Heir. And I am very apt to think, this Laft is the true Reading; and that an Equivoque, as the French call it, a double Meaning, is defign'd in the Poet's Allufion: and therefore I have replac'd it in the Text. In 1589, Henry III. of France

S. Ant. Where England?

S. Dro. I look'd for the chalky cliffs, but I could find no whiteness in them; but I guess, it ftood in her chin, by the falt rheum that ran between France and it. S. Ant. Where Spain?

S. Dro. Faith, I faw it not, but I felt it hot in her breath.

S. Ant. Where America, the Indies?

S. Dro. Oh, Sir, upon her nofe, all o'er embellish'd with rubies, carbuncles, faphires; declining their rich afpect to the hot breath of Spain, who fent whole armadoes of carracts to be ballaft at her nofe.

To con

S. Ant. Where ftood Belgia, the Netherlands? S. Dro. Oh, Sir, I did not look fo low. clude, this drudge, or diviner, laid claim to me, call'd me Dromio, fwore I was affur'd to her, told me what privy marks I had about me, as the marks of my fhoulder, the mole in my neck, the great wart on my left arm, that I, amaz'd, ran from her as a witch. And, I think, if my breast had not been made of faith, and my heart of fteel, fhe had transform'd me to a curtal-dog, and made me turn i'th' wheel.

S. Ant. Go, hie thee presently; poft to the road; And if the wind blow any way from shore,

I will not harbour in this town to night.

If

any bark put forth, come to the mart; Where I will walk, 'till thou return to me:

being ftab'd, and dying of his Wound, was fucceeded by Henry IV. of Navarre, whom he appointed his Succeffor; but whofe Claim the States of France refifted, on account of his being a Proteftant. This, I take it, is what he means, by France making War against her Heir. Now as, in 1591, Queen Elizabeth fent over 4000 Men, under the Conduct of the Earl of Effex, to the Affiftance of this Henry of Navarre; it seems to me very probable, that during this Expedition being on foot, this Comedy made its Appearance. And it was the finest Address imaginable in the Poet, to throw fuch an oblique Sneer at France, for oppofing the Succeffion of that Heir, whofe Claim his Royal Mistress, the Queen, had fent over a Force to eftablish, and oblige them to acknowledge.

If every one know us, and we know none,
'Tis time, I think, to trudge, pack and be gone.

S. Dro. As from a bear a man would run for life,
So fly I from her that would be my wife.

[Exit.

S. Ant. There's none but witches do inhabit here; And therefore 'tis high time that I were hence: She, that doth call me husband, even my foul Doth for a wife abhor. But her fair fifter, Poffeft with fuch a gentle fovereign grace, Of fuch inchanting prefence and difcourfe, Hath almost made me traitor to myself: But left myself be guilty of felf-wrong, I'll ftop mine ears against the mermaid's fong. Enter Angelo, with a Chain.

Ang. Mafter Antipholis,

S. Ant. Ay, that's my name.

Ang. I know it well, Sir; lo, here is the chain;
I thought t' have ta'en you at the Porcupine;
The chain, unfinish'd, made me ftay thus long.
S. Ant. What is your will, that I fhall do with this?
Ang. What please yourself, Sir; I have made it for you.
S. Ant. Made it for me, Sir! I bespoke it not.
Ang. Not once, nor twice, but twenty times, you have:
Go home with it, and please your wife withal;
And foon at fupper-time I'll vifit you,
And then receive my mony for the chain.

S. Ant. I pray you, Sir, receive the mony now;
For fear you ne'er fee chain, nor mony, more.
Ang. You are a merry man, Sir; fare you well.

[Exit.
S. Ant. What I fhould think of this, I cannot tell :
But this I think, there's no man is fo vain,
That would refuse so fair an offer'd chain.
I fee, a man here needs not live by shifts,
When in the ftreets he meets fuch golden gifts:
I'll to the mart, and there for Dromio ftay;
If any fhip put out, then strait away.

[Exit.

ACT

ACT IV..

SCENE, The Street.

Enter a Merchant, Angelo, and an Officer.

Yo

MERCHANT.

OU know, fince Pentecoft the fum is due ;
And fince I have not much importun'd you;
Nor now I had not, but that I am bound
To Perfia, and want gilders for my voyage :
Therefore make prefent fatisfaction;
Or I'll attach you by this officer.

Ang. Ev'n juft the fum, that I do owe to you,
growing to me by Antipholis ;

And, in the inftant that I met with you,
He had of me a chain: at five o' clock,
1 hall receive the mony for the fame :

Pleafe you but walk with me down to his house,
I will difcharge my bond, and thank you too.

Enter Antipholis of Ephefus, and Dromio of Ephefus, as from the Courtezan's.

Offi. That labour you may fave: fee, where he comes. E. Ant. While I go to the goldfmith's houfe, go thou And buy a rope's end; that will I bestow

Among my wife and her confederates,

For locking me out of my doors by day.
But, foft; I fee the goldsmith: get thee gone,
Buy thou a rope, and bring it home to me.

E. Dro. I buy a thousand pound a year! I buy a

rope! [Exit Dromio. E. Ant. A man is well holp up, that trufts to you: I promifed your prefence, and the chain :

But neither chain, nor goldsmith, came to me:

Belike,

Belike, you thought, our love would laft too long
If it were chain'd together; therefore came not.

Ang. Saving your merry humour, here's the note,
How much your chain weighs to the utmost carrat;
The fineness of the gold, the chargeful fashion;
Which do amount to three odd ducats more,
Than I ftand debted to this gentleman;

I pray you, fee him presently discharg'd;
For he is bound to fea, and ftays but for it.
E. Ant. I am not furnish'd with the present mony;
Befides, I have fome bufinefs in the town;
Good Signior, take the ftranger to my house,
And with you take the chain, and bid my wife
Disburse the fum on the receipt thereof;
Perchance, I will be there as foon as you.

Ang. Then you will bring the chain to her yourself? E. Ant. No; bear it with you, left I come not tim enough.

Ang. Well, Sir, I will have you the chain abou you?

E. Ant. An if I have not, Sir, I hope, you have: Or else you may return without your mony.

Ang. Nay, come, I pray you, Sir, give me the chain Both wind and tide ftay for this gentleman; And I, to blame, have held him here too long. E. Ant. Good lord, you use this dalliance to excufe Your, breach of promife to the Porcupine: I fhould have chid you for not bringing it; But, like a fhrew, you firft begin to brawl. Mer. The hour steals on; I pray you, Sir, dispatch. Ang. You hear, how he importunes me; the chainE. Ant. Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your

mony.

Ang. Come, come, you know, I gave it you ev'n now Or fend the chain, or fend me by fome token.

E. Ant. Fie, now you run this humour out of breath Come, where's the chain? I pray you, let me fee it. Mer. My business cannot brook this dalliance: Good Sir, fay, whe'r you'll answer me, or no; If not, I'll leave him to the officer.

E. Ant

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