If you will jeft with me, know my aspect, S. Dro. Sconce, call you it? fo you would leave battering, I had rather have it a head; an you use these blows long, I must get a fconce for my head, and infconce it too, or else I shall seek my wit in my fhoulders: but, I pray, Sir, why am I beaten ? Ant. Doft thou not know? S. Dro. Nothing, Sir, but that I am beaten. S. Dro. Ay, Sir, and wherefore; for, they say, every why hath a wherefore. Ant. Why, firft, for flouting me; and then wherefore, for urging it the second time to me. S. Dro. Was there ever any man thus beaten out of season, When, in the why, and wherefore, is neither rhime nor reafon ? Well, Sir, I thank you. Ant. Thank me, Sir, for what? S. Dro. Marry, Sir, for this fomething that you gave me for nothing. Ant. I'll make you amends next, to give you nothing for fomething. But fay, Sir, is it dinner-time? S. Dro. No, Sir, I think, the meat wants that I have. Ant. In good time, Sir; what's that? S. Dro. Bafting. Ant. Well, Sir, then 'twill be dry. S. Dro. If it be, Sir, I pray you eat none of it. S. Dro. Left it make you cholerick, and purchase me another dry-bafting. Ant. Well, Sir, learn to jeft in good time; there's a time for all things. S. Dro. I durit have deny'd that, before you were sa cholerick. Ant. By what rule, Sir? VOL. III. I S. Dro. S. Dro. Marry, Sir, by a rule as plain as the plain bald pate of father Time himself. Ant. Let's hear it. S. Dro. There's no time for a man to recover his hair, that grows bald by nature. Ant. May he not do it by fine and recovery? S. Dro. Yes, to pay a fine for a peruke, and recover the loft hair of another man. (4) Ant. Why is Time such a niggard of hair, being, as it is, fo plentiful an excrement? S. Dro. Because it is a bleffing that he bestows on beafts; and what he hath scanted men in hair, he hath given them in wit. Ant. Why, but there's many a man hath more hair than wit. S. Dro. Not a man of thofe, but he hath the wit to lofe his hair. Ant. Why, thou didst conclude hairy men plain dealers without wit. S. Dro. The plainer dealer, the fooner loft; yet he lofeth it in a kind of jollity. Ant. For what reason ? S. Dro. For two, and found ones too. S. Dro. Sure ones then. Ant. Nay, not fure in a thing falfing. Ant. Name them. S. Dro. The one to fave the money that he spends in tyring; the other, that at dinner they should not drop in his porridge. (4) Ant. Why is Time fuch a Niggard of Hair, being, as it is, Jo plentiful an Excrement? S. Dro. Because it is a Blessing that he bestows on Beasts, and what he hath Scanted them in hair, he hath given them in Wit.] Surely, this is Mock-reafoning, and a Contradiction in Sense. Can Hair be fuppos'd a Bleffing, which Time beftows on Beafts peculiarly; and yet that he hath feanted them of it too? Men and Them, I observe, are very frequently mistaken vice versa for each other, in the old Impreffions of our Author. Ant. Ant. You would all this time have prov'd, there is no time for all things. S. Dro. Marry, and did, Sir; namely, no time to recover hair loft by nature. Ant. But your reason was not subftantial, why there is no time to recover. S. Dro. Thus I mend it: Time himself is bald, and therefore to the world's end will have bald followers. Ant. I knew, 'twould be a bald conclufion: but, foft! who wafts us yonder? Enter Adriana, and Luciana. Adri. Ay, ay, Antipholis, look ftrange and frown, Some other miftrefs hath thy fweet aspects : I am not Adriana, nor thy wife. The time was once, when thou, unurg'd, wouldst vow, How comes it now, my husband, oh, how comes it, Am better than thy dear felf's better part. As take from me thy felf; and not me too. And And from my falfe hand cut the wedding-ring, I know thou can'ft; and therefore, fee, thou do it. Being ftrumpeted by thy contagion. (5) I know you not: Keep then fair league, and truce with thy true bed; talk. Luc. Fie, brother! how the world is chang'd with you; When were you wont to use my fifter thus ? She fent for you by Dromio home to dinner. Ant. By Dromio? S. Dro. By me? Adr. By thee; and thus thou didft return from him, 'That he did buffet thee; and in his blows Deny'd my house for his, me for his wife. Ant. Did you converfe, Sir, with this gentlewoman? What is the course and drift of your compact? S. Dro. I, Sir? I never faw her 'till this time. S. Dro. I never spoke with her in all my life. Adr. How ill agrees it with your gravity, To counterfeit thus grofly with your flave, (s) I live distain'd, thou undishonour'd.] To distaine (from the French Word, deftaindre) fignifies, to ftain, defile, pollute. But the Context requires a Senfe quite oppofite. We muft either read, unftain'd; or, by adding an Hyphen, and giving the Prepofition a privative Force, read dif-ftain'd; and then it will mean, unftain'd, undefiled. Abet Abetting him to thwart me in my mood? Who, all for want of pruning, with intrufion Ant. To me the speaks; the moves me for her theam › What, was I marry'd to her in my dream? Or fleep I now, and think I hear all this? I'll entertain the favour'd fallacy. Luc. Dromio, go bid the fervants spread for dinner. S. Dro. Oh, for my beads! I crofs me for a finner. This is the Fairy land: oh, fpight of spights! We talk with goblins, ouphs, and elvish sprights; (6) If we obey them not, this will enfue, They'll fuck our breath, and pinch us black and blue. Luc. Why prat'ft thou to thy felf, and answer'st not? (7) Dromio, thou drone, thou fnail, thou flug, thou fot! S. Dre. (6) We talk with Goblins, Owls, and elvish Sprights;] They might fancy, they talk'd with Goblins and Sprights; but why with Owls, in the Name of Nonfenfe? Or could Owls fuck their Breath, and pinch them black and blue? I dare say, my Readers will acquiefce in the Juftness of my Emendation here: The Word is common with our Author in other Pallages. (7) Why prat't thou to thy felf? Dromio, thou Dromio, fnail, thou flug, thou fot.] In the first of these Lines, Mr. Rowe and Mr. Pope have Both, for what Reason I cannot tell, curtail'd the Measure, and dif |