One would have thought so; but it is no such thing. The encounter took place in Regent-street, and the moment our eyes met, which was at a distance of some ten yards, I saw that all was over. I tried, as Malvolio says, " to quench his familiar looks with an austere regard of control," but London was not Dublin, and the plan that succeeded on one side of the channel was of no use whatever upon the other. He advanced at a charging pace, with an expression of countenance which an intimacy of three centuries would not have justified; he seized me by the hand, and adroitly availing himself of the only relationship beyond that of mere humanity, which existed between us, he challenged me for his country man! How intensely at that moment did I hate Ireland! To hear the miscreant talk of the ties of country, and the land of the stranger, you would have supposed that we had both come from the Antipodes. "My dear fellow,"-dear fellow! was there ever such audacity ?—“ I am overjoyed to meet you-your's is the first Irish face I have seen since I arrived in London; it is really quite delightful to meet a countryman abroad, we shall be so intimate-all Irishmen are intimate in London-(a startling proposition!)-we shall be together, I hope, as much as possible:"(Heaven forfend, I prayed mentally)-" sons of Erin, you know, both of us :-two Irishmen against the world!-we shall breakfast and dine together every day"-(daggers and stilettos!)--" our motto shall be, Quis separabit '-(ten thousand devils!)-let me have your address, my dear fellow." My address !-this was driving the nail home and clinching it. "No. 36, Charlotte-street, Fitzroy-square," fell from my tongue, just as if it had been wrenched out of me with a thumb-screw. He repeated it slowly after me, deploring his bad memory for names and numbers. Here was a chance in my favour! I besought Heaven to souse him over head and ears in Lethe! Alas! I grasped at a straw. His memory may have been naturally a bad one; but the rascal had spared no pains to improve it; he showed himself perfect master of all the methods that have ever been recommended for that VOL. VI. purpose from the days of John Locke to those of Von Feinagle. "No. 36, Charlotte-street, Fitzroysquare-36, Charlotte-street, Fitzroysquare, No. 36-No. 36-No. 36-my own number is 29-just seven morethe number of days in the week-a little Memoria Technica I have of my own" (the scoundrel!)" you cannot conceive how useful I find it-only for it I should to a certainty forget your number before I reach the corner of the street." This was too much for flesh and blood! Here was a knave who did his business scientifically, "selon les regles," as Molière's doctors kill their patients. I flung myself from him with a convulsive effort-whither I went I neither knew nor cared; even when I had turned my back upon him I distinctly heard him repeating-" No. 36, Charlotte-street, Fitzroy-squareNo. 36, Charlotte-street-Charlottestreet, Fitzroy-square, 36.” Another specimen !-the varieties of the species are infinite "De quelque part qu'on tourne on ne voit que des fous." Citely never opens his lips but to let out a quotation. He dins me with morsels of French; deluges me with "odds and ends" of Shakspeare, Byron, Cowper, and Wordsworth. Every thing you say, every thing that happens, suggests a phrase or a rhyme which he has hoarded up in his memory, for the torment of his friends and acquaintances. His mind is a sort of scrap-book; or it may still better be. compared to a tailor's hell, a repertory of shreds and patches of all colours and no use. He disdains to express the commonest idea, or reply to the plainest question in the ordinary household language of society. He couches every thing he says in a bit of an epic, a verse of a song, or a sentence from a French vocabulary. "As Virgil says," "to use the language of Milton," "in the words of Pope," "to borrow the expression of Moore,"--these and the like phrases are the regular commencements or conclusions of all his observations; and what makes this absurd habit still more offensive, the block head never quotes a line that is not as familiar and hackneyed as one of Joe Miller's jests, as trite as the compli P ments of the drawing-room. The truth is, he draws his whole artillery from such books as Elegant Extracts, and Alfred Howard's " Beauties ;" and even from these stores he never produces a passage that the ear is not as intimate with as with the cry of " Dublin Bay herrings." A doctor's carriage runs over a child in Grafton-street :-you would call it a shocking accidentCitely invokes Shakspeare, and exclaims, "horrible, horrible, most horrible!" There is a bad house at the theatre you would remark that the dress circle was thin--not so Citely; he treats me to the stale newspaper witticism: "A beggarly account of empty boxes." Is there a wordy war between two fish-wives in Ormond Market, I reckon upon "Tantæne animis celestibus iræ," as confidently as upon the delivery of my tailor's bill. Does he invite me to dinner, he disdains to say, you will meet agreeable people," or you will have some pleasant conversation." Oh, no!" he borrows the words of the poet," and promises me" the feast of reason and flow of soul," a quotation which ought to subject the person perpetrating it to transportation for fourteen years, if, indeed, it ought not to be made a capital felony. My visits to this gentleman are always, (as he describes them, would the description were just!) like those of angels, "few and far between." The post-office clock never strikes twelve at night, but Citely repeats "The iron tongue of midnight has told twelve." A chimney-sweeper passes by-" Hic niger est." A cock crows; "the cock's shrill clarion," you are well if you do not get the whole of the elegy. He meets the Lord Mayor: I am ready to stake all I have in the world to the very coat upon my back, that Citely never met the Lord Mayor in his life, but he inflicted, man, vain man, &c. &c. &c." upon whatsoever wretched being happened at the moment to be in his company. Now, tell me, sir, is not this a nuisance, a very nuisance? I am afraid to call my best friend an honest man for fear of " the noblest work of God," with which this dunce would infallibly wind up the compliment. I shudder at the appearance of a butterfly, for I know that the horrid lines in the Giaour-this fellow has made them horrid-must follow; I hate flowers for the same reason, particularly the daisy and the rose, which have unfortunately been the chief favourites of the poets; and the horror I feel at the very thought of a nightingale is too much for words to give you any idea of; in short, Citely has, in a great measure, destroyed all my enjoyment of poetry and the works of nature, and to get rid of him is out of the question, for were I to stab him he would cry, “Et tu Brute Were I to kick him down stairs, he would burst forth with "What is friendship but a name?" Were I ever so civilly to assure him that it was absolutely indispensable for both my bodily health and my mental peace, that there should be a treaty of separation between us, the remorseless villain would ejaculate "Fare thee well, and if for ever, and as this last is a passage with which I have been assaulted at the least ten thousand times, (for he never took leave of any one without hurling it at him,) it is my firm conviction that one more attack of it would be the death of me. Publicola is a bore of another kind, not so malignant as the last specimen ; yet one who contributes his mite to make my life intolerable. I call him Publicola, because he considers himself a sort of public character, and seems to be of opinion, that no public establishment or public institution can possibly prosper without his active interference, or at least his countenance. He is a great man at the Mendicity Association, and his influence at the Zoological Gardens is such, that the very monkeys pay him a marked attention whenever he approaches their settlement. He is a formidable rival to the SurgeonGeneral. He differs essentially from my bore political, who never deigns to meddle with anything less than a treaty of peace, or a grand constitutional question. Publicola's sphere is a local and domestic one; his field of activity is not the country but the capital; not Ireland but Ďublin. You never open a newspaper but you see a letter subscribed Vindex, Scrutator, or a Constant Reader, calling the attention of the proper authorities" to the state of the pavement in Parliamentstreet, the activity of the pick-pockets on Carlisle-bridge, or the negligence of some oblivious lamp-lighter, who has left one side of Mountjoy-square in total darkness. Nineteen-twentieths of this class of letters are from Publicola's pen. He is the self-constituted comptroller-general of the Paving-board the Pipe-water office, and the Police department; he exercises a sort of episcopal jurisdiction over all watchmen, scavengers, and turn-cocks; he it is who in the columns of Saunders inveighs against obstructive apple-women and insolent horse-boys; he it is who in the Register asserts the public cause against dirty footways and furious driving; he it is who in the Freeman calls in a voice of thunder for the watering of the Rock road, and demands the instant demolition of whole lanes and alleys in the Liberties. Publicola is the grand conservator of the lives and limbs of his Majesty's subjects," the name by which he always designates the good people of Dublin. It is not his fault if you return home with your eyes filled with dust, or the track of a coach wheel in a deep groove across your ribs. He exercises, through the medium of the press, particularly the morning journals, a power, which, as he" has no other object in view but to benefit the public," (a declaration with which he prefaces all his letters,) I might call almost tribunitial. To do the blockhead justice, there is a little benevolence in combination with his vanity; he is a compound of busy-body and philanthropist, the former element preponderating greatly over the latter. I really should not have put him down amongst the bores of my acquaintance at all, if it was not that he forces me to read, and not only to read, but actually to buy every newspaper in which he figures as a correspondent! I have got a file of papers three feet thick, in every one of which there is a letter, either to the Commissioners of Widestreets, or the Board of Trinity College, upon the opening of Nassaustreet, a subject upon which he is particularly copious, and the importance of which, he declares, " cannot be too highly rated!" At present he is at the Kingstown Railway Company : he makes every day some new suggestion, or discovers something wrong in the management, so that I am in a pretty dilemma. If the company does not act upon his hints, he will go on hinting, until the expense of newspapers becomes quite overwhelming if they comply in but a single particular with his advice, or make any alteration he proposes, it will stimulate him to renewed efforts; he will persevere in letter-writing; he will address all the societies, boards, and companies, literary, civil, military, ecclesiastical, and commercial, in the metropolis, not omitting the very infant schools and cow-pock institutions; in either case, therefore, I must suffer. Upon one horn or other of this terrible dilemma I must be tossed, and 1 should very nearly as soon be gored by a wild bull. Nearly! why did I say nearly? just as soon, every whit, so expunge the nearly. There ranges the woods no animal half so formidable to man as the bore of the British islands. It is a pun, I know, but I am capable of any atrocity, maddened as I am by my wrongs and miseries. I am tempted almost to invoke Meleager to my aid, he who slew the great boar of Calydon, and laid the head of the monster at the feet of Atalanta. Oh! for such an offering to lay at the feet of a modern mistress! Could not a price be set upon bores' heads? This was the way in which our good old kings extirpated the wolves, We trust that our unfortunate and persecuted friend (with whose distresses we sincerely sympathise) means no uncomplimentary allusion to a nobleman who takes his title from a town whose name is almost identical with that of the Grecian village from which the great boar of antiquity derived his. His lordship has certainly been boring a committee of the House of Commons with some extraordinary evidence on the subject of the Orangemen of the county Tyrone. LETTER FROM AN OLD ORANGEMAN. IN giving insertion to the following letter, we think it right to preface it with a few observations. Upon a very recent occasion we stated fully and unreservedly our own opinions upon the subject of the Orange Institution, and endeavoured to place before the public such information, as to its origin and character, as might vindicate its members from the gross and utterly unfounded calumnies which have been so industriously circulated against them. We had intended to return to the subject, but our correspondent has, for the present, taken it out of our hands. Our readers will, perhaps, perceive, that much of his letter is a repetition of the statements which we put forward in our former article; but we have lived long enough to learn that the constant repetition of falsehood can only be met by the equally industrious exhibition of truth, and it is well that the facts which we urged should be kept constantly before the public eye. There are many opinions incidentally expressed by our correspondent for which we do not wish to be held responsible. But concurring in general with his views, and convinced that anything that keeps up inquiry upon the subject of Orangeism, must be productive of good-we have determined upon publishing his letter. We beg the particular attention of our readers to the extract from the memorial of Wolfe Tone to the French Directory, so completely corroborating our former statement with regard to the early and extensive organization of defenderism— and so directly contradicting Mr. O'Connell's sworn testimony before the Lords' Committee in 1825-when the honorable and learned gentleman stated that the origin of defenderism was subsequent to the establishment of the first Orange Lodge. (See University Magazine for April, 1835. Vol. V. note to page 478.) We gladly avail ourselves of this opportunity, to return our best thanks to Dr. Stuart, the editor of the Belfast Guardian, for much valuable information which he supplied to us relative to the early origin of the Institution, and of which, in our former article, we largely availed ourselves. We are also indebted to him for the correction of an unimportant error into which we had fallen. We had used the expression, the village of the Diamond. Our readers will, perhaps, excuse us if we extract the following from the Guardian of April, 21st: "Now, with much respect for the talents, research, and information evinced by our excellent contemporary, the Editor of the University Magazine, we beg leave to inform him and the public that, in common with the historians, Musgrave and Hardy, he is in error when he asserts that the first Orange Lodge was formed in the village of the Diamond, on the 21st of September, 1795. We, by no means, blame him for his mistake, since even Mr. Verner for a considerable time laboured under the same misapprehension. We now take the liberty of stating that no village existed at the DIAMOND in the year 1795; and even at the present moment, the few houses which are to be found there, scarcely merit the name of a hamlet. Secondly, The Orange Lodge, No. I, was the first established in the beautiful village called the DIAN, situated in Lord Caledon's estate, county of Tyrone. It was held in the house of a man named St. John Duff, where its members have their periodical meetings at the present time, but we believe that the name of the now owner of the place is Hooey. The causes which induced the formation of this and other Lodges were as follow: -Previous to the great fight which took place at the Diamond, an immense number of Roman Catholics (probably from 8 to 10,000) had assembled from various quarters-some from Pomeroy, some from Ballygawley, some from the mountainous parts of the county Armagh, and some, as has been alleged, we know not how truly, even from Connaught. It was generally believed that the object which these men had in view was to destroy the houses of the Protestant inhabitants of Loughgall and Kilmore, and their vicinities. Under this impression, a number of Protestants assembled, some of whom (probably about thirty-six in number) had been volunteers, and were well disciplined; the remainder, amounting to 6 or 700, were armed with guns, pistols, and other such weapons of offence and defence as they were able to procure. The dreadful conflict betwixt the two opposing parties took place at the Diamond, which position the Protestants defended against the tumultuous host of their assailants with perseverance and vigour. At last, after a protracted combat, the Roman Catholic party were finally discomfited, and fled in utter confusion, leaving a number of their men dead on the field. In the course of the harvest, several others, who had been slain on that memorable day, (21st September, 1795,) were found, as we have been informed, amongst the corn, then in progress of being reaped. A considerable portion of the routed Romanists made their escape into the county of Tyrone, and alarmed the inhabitants of the Dian and other districts in that neighbourhood. In consequence of these events, Mr. Thomas Wilson (as we have reason to believe) assembled a number of his own friends, who met at the house of Mr. James Sloane, of Loughgall, and held a consultation as to the formation of societies, who were to assemble periodically, abide by certain rules and regulations, and act together for mutual protection. Twelve or more lodges were then planned and constituted, and the matter was so arranged, (we believe by lot,) that No. I. was established in the Dian, in the county of Tyrone. The original form for this number, signed by James Sloane, is, we believe, still in existence." We trust that it is unnecessary for us to reiterate our solemn declaration, that in identifying ourselves with the cause of the Orange Institution, we have done so only because we believe it to be an association based upon the purest principles of Christian charity, an association of which toleration is the charter, and the only object to maintain the integrity of our constitution and the principles of civil and religious liberty. Let it be proved to us that we are deceived in this belief, and we will join in the cry for its suppression. Once more we reprint the fundamental rule of the Institution. This is exclusively a PROTESTANT ASSOCIATION-yet detesting an intolerant spirit, it admits no one into its brotherhood who is not well known to be incapable of persecuting, injuring, or upbraiding any one on account of his religious opinions. Its principle is to aid and assist loyal subjects of every persuasion by protecting them from violence and oppression." TO THE EDITOR OF THE DUBLIN UNIVERSITY MAGAZINE. SIR-I am now in my eighty-seventh year, and it is not a little matter that could induce me to take up my pen for the purpose of claiming a place in your pages. But these are times when both old and young are called upon to exert themselves for the public good; and if the latter may be best employed in those active labours by which a proper spirit may be excited amongst the people, and measures taken for arresting the career of the demagogue and the incendiary, in their pernicious work of disorganization, I know not how the former may be more usefully or honourably occupied, than in giving the latter, from time to time, the benefit of their observation and experience. My present remarks shall be confined to the Orange Institution, which is now, I perceive, upon its trial before a Committee of the House of Commons. I am acquainted with that institution since its formation. I was well aware of the necessity out of which it arose. as if there was a kind of subterI knew its founders, most of whom ranean communication between the were my personal friends; and I have volcanic mountains, by which they watched its workings; and never, I will were enabled to sympathise with venture to say, was an institution so providentially calculated for the preservation of peace and order, or for furnishing an anti-septic to the contagion of those revolutionary principles which were, at the time of its origin, agitating England, convulsing Ireland, and disorganizing Europe. Judge, then, of my surprise and indignation at hearing it denounced in the House of Commons as the "fons and origo" of all our evils. These denunciations proceeded, indeed, from a party, to whose designs it has always been adverse, and who could not, therefore, be expected to give it a good word. But verily, I was almost amused by their audacity. It was something like hearing Abel accused of the murder of Cain! I well remember the state of feeling in this country in 1795. We are told by the poet, that, "When Hecla thunders, Chimborazo raves," |