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“ Hold, not so fast,” cries he; “pray pardon She needed not much courtship to be kind,
He ambles on before, she trots behind; Maids with huge, gaping, wide mouths, must have for little Bobby, to her shoulders bound, three.”
Hinders the gentle dame from ridding ground. Betty distorts her face with hideous squall, He often ask'd her to expose; but she And mouth of a foot wide begins to bawi,
Still fear'd the coming of his company. “Oh! ho! is't so? The case is alter'd, Paul. Says she, “ I know an unfrequented place, Is that the point? I wish the three were ten; To the left band, where we our time may pass, I warrant I'd find mouth, if they'll find men.” And the mean while your horse may find some
grass." Thither they come, and both the horse secure ;
Then thinks the squire, I have the matter sure. HOLD FAST BELOW.
She's ask'd to sit: but then excuse is inade,
“Sitting," says she, “ 's not usual in my trade: THERE was a lad, th’unluckiest of his crew,
Should you be rude, and then should throw me Was still contriving something bad, but new.
down, His comrades all obedience to him paid,
I might perhaps break more backs than my own." In executing what designs he laid:
He smiling cries, “Come, I'll the knot untie, 'Twas they should rob the orchard, he'd retire,
And, if you mean the child's, we'll lay it by.” His foot was safe whilst theirs was in the fire.
Says she, “ That can't be done, for then 'twill cry. He kept them in the dark to that degree,
I'd not have us, but chiefly for your sake, None should presume to be so wise as he ;
Discover'd by the hideous noise 'twould make. But, being at the top of all affairs,
Use is another nature, and 'twould lack, The profit was his own, the mischief theirs. More than the breast, its custom to the back.” There fell some words made him begin to doubt,
Then,” says the gentleman, “I should be loth The rogues would grow so wise to find him out;
To coine so far and disoblige you both : He was not pleas'd with this, and so next day
Were the child tied to me, d'ye think, 'twould He cries to them, as going just to play,
“ Mighty well, sir! Oh, Lord! if tied to you!" " What a rare jack-daw's nest is there! look up,
With speed incredible to work she goes, You see 'tis almost at the steeple's top."
And from her shoulder soon the burthen throws; * Ah,” says another, “we can have no hope
Then mounts the infant with a gentle toss Of getting thither to 't without a rope.”
Upon her generous friend, and, like a cross, Says then the fileering spark, with courteous grin, The sheet she with a dextrous motion winds, By which he drew his infant cullies in;
Till a firm knot the wandering fabric binds. * Nothing more easy; did you never see
The gentleman had scarce got time to know How, in a swarm, bees, hanging bee by bee,
What she was doing; she, about to go, Make a long sort of rope below the tree.
Cries, “ Sir, good b'ye; ben't angry that we part, Why mayn't we do the same, good Mr. John?
I trust the child to you with all my heart : For that contrivance pray let me alone.
But, ere you get another, 't'en't amiss Tom shall hold Will, you Will, and I'll hold you;
To try a year or two how you'll keep this,”.
A parish fam’d, because the men were wise :
Of their own strain they had a teacher sought,
Who all his life was better fed than taught. " The dogs are almost useless grown to me,
It was about a quarter of a year I ne'er shall have such opportunity
Since he had snor'd, and eat, and fatten'd there; To part with them; and so e'en let them go."
When he the house-keepers, their wives, and all, Then cries aloud, “ So ho! my lads ! so bo!
Did to a sort of parish-meeting call; You're gone, unless ye all hold fast below. They've serv'd my turn, so 'tis fit time to drop In little time would turn to all their good. [lind,
Promising something, which, well understood, them;
When met, he thus harangues:“ Neighbours, I The Devil, if he wants them, let him stop them.”
That in your principles you're well inclin'd:
Most people then their dinners have to seek,
As if'twere not the first day of the week;
But, when you have hash'd meat and nothing more, A GENTLEMAN in hunting rode astray,
You only curse the day that went before. More out of choice, than that he lost his way: On Tuesday all folks dine by one consent, He let his company the hare pursue,
And Wednesdays only fast by parliament,
But fasting sure by Nature ne'er was meant.
Mistress," quoth he," and what if we two After fish, Saturday requires some meat;
And the same law ordains a pudding then, My word's a law; when I my power adrande, To children grateful, nor unfit for men.
There's not a greater monarch er'n in France. Take hens, geese, turkies, then, or something light, Not the mogul or czar of Muscovy, Because their legs, if broil'd, will serve at night, Not Prester John, or cham of Tartary, And, since I find that roast beef makes you sleep, Are in their houses monarch more than I. Corn it a little more, and so 'twill keep.
My house my castle is, and here I'm king, Roast it on Monday, pity it should be spoil'd; I'm pope, I'm emperor, monarch, every thing. On Tuesday mutton either roast or boil'd,
What though my wife be partner of my bed, On Wednesday should be some variety,
The monarch's crown sits only on this head." A loin or breast of veal, and pigeon-pye.
His wife had plaguy ears, as well as tongue, On Thursday each man of his dish make choice, And, hearing all, thought his discoure too long: 'Tis fit on market-days we all rejoice.
Her conscience said, he should not tell such lies, And then on Friday, as I said before,
And to her knowledge such ; she therefore cries, We'll have a dish of fish, and one dish more. “ D'ye hear-you-Sirrah-Monarch-thereOn Saturday stew'd beef, with something nice,
come down Provided quick, and toss'd up in a trice,
And grind the coffee—or I'll crack your crown."
JUST AS YOU PLEASE;
A virtuoso had a mind to see “ Now for the application, and the use :
One that would never discontented be,
But in a careless way to all agree.
“ Ilumpus," says he, “I order that you find It is a bitter business to deny;
Out such a man, with such a character, But, who is't cares for fourteen meals a day,
As in this paper now I give you here; As for my own part, I had rather stay,
Or I will lug your ears, or crack your pate, And take them now and then,—and here and Or rather you shall meet with a worse fate, According to my present bill of fare, [there,
For I will break your back, and set you strait. You know I'm single: if you all agree
Bring him to dinner,” Humpus soon withdrew, To treat by turns, each will be sure of me."
Was safe, as having such a one in view The vestry all applauded with a hum,
At Covent Garden dial, whom he found
Sitting with thoughtless air and look profound,
Says Humpus, “Sir, my master bade me pray
Your company to dine with him to-day.”
He snuffs; then follows; up the stairs he goes, When the young people ride the Skimmington, Never pulls off his hat, nor cleans his shoes, There is a gencral trembling in a town:
But, looking round him, saw a handsome room, Not only be for whom the person rides
And did not much repent that he was come; Suffers, but they sweep other doors besides; Close to the fire he draws an elbow-chair, And by that hieroglyphic does appear
And, lolling easy, doth for sleep prepare. That the good woman is the master there.
In comes the family, but he sits still, At Jenny's door the barbarous heathens swept, Thinks, “Let them take the other chairs that And his poor wife scolded until she wept;
will !" The mob swept on, whilst she sent forth in vain The master thus accosts him, “Sir, you're wet, Her vocal thunder and her briny rain.
Pray have a cushion underneath your feet.”
Dinner's brought up; the wife is bid retreat, T'other on this ungrateful subject falls.
And at the upper end must be his seat, “ Pray, Mrs. Jenny, whence came this report, “ This is not very usual," thinks the clown : For I believe there's no great reason for't,
But is not all the family his own? As if the folks t'other day swept your door, And why should I, for contradiction's sake, And half a dozen of your neighbours more ?" Lose a good dinner, which he bids me take? “ There's nothing in't," says Jenny; " that is done If from this table she discarded be, Where the wife rules, but here I rule alone, What need I care! there is the more for me." And, gentlemen, you'd much mistaken be,
After a while, the daughter's bid to stand, If any one should not think that of me.
And bring him whatsoever he'll command. Within these walls, my suppliant vassals know Thinks he, “The better from the fairer hand !" What due obedience to their prince they owe, Young master next must rise, to fill him wine, And kiss the shadow of my papal toe.
And starve himself, to see the booby dine:
He does. The father asks, “What have you for, if burnt milk should to the bottom stick, there?
Like over-heated zeal, 'twould make folks sick. How dare you give a stranger vinegar?”
Into the milk her flour she gently throws,
Thinks the clown, “ That 'twas wine I do be- | And seems to want no graces but its own.
When the desert came on, and jellies brought, Which, melting with the heat, its beams displays;
II. A HEDGE-HOG AFTER A QUAKING-PUDDING. Said, “Sir, it was my lady gave them me." - As Neptune, when the three-tongu'd fork he No more such poison shall sbe ever give,
takes, I'll burn the witch; 't'ent fitting she should live: With strength divine the globe terrestrial shakes, Set faggots in the court, I'll make her fry;
The highest hills, Nature's stupendous piles, And pray, good sir, may't please you to be by ?” Break with the force, and quiver into isles;
Then, smiling, says the clown, Upon my life, Yet on the ruins grow the lofty pines, A pretty fancy this, to burn one's wife!
And snow unmelted in the vallies shines:
The trembling lump, with butter all around,
And yet the tops appear, whilst almonds thick
With bright loaf-sugar on the surface stick. For a dream cometh through the multitude of "II. PUDDINGS OF VARIOUS COLOUÁS IN A DISII. business.
You, painter-like, now variegate the shade, ECCLES. V, 4.
And thus from puddings there's a landscape made.
And Wise and London', when they would dispose Somnia, quæ ludunt mente volitantibus umbris, Their ever-greens into well-order'd rows, Non delubra deûm nec ab æthere numina mittunt, So mix their colours, that each different plant Sed sibi quisque facit, &c.
Gives light and shadow as the others want.
IV. MAKING OF A GOOD PUDDING GETS A GOOD The flitting dreams, that play before the wind,
HUSBAND. Are not bf Heaven for prophesies design’d;
Ye virgins, as these lines you kindly take, Nor by ethereal beings sent us down,
So may you still such glorious pudding make, But each man is creator of bis own
That crouds of youth may ever be at strife, For, when their weary limbs are sunk in ease,
To gain the sweet-composer for his wife ! The souls essay to wander where they please ; 'The scatter'd images have space to play,
V. SACK AND SUGAR TO QUAKING-PUDDING. And might repeats the labours of the day,
“Oh, delicious!” But where must our confession first begin,
If sack and sugar once be thought a sin? THE ART OF MAKING PUDDINGS.
VI. BROILED PUDDING.
Hip in the dark, we mortals seldom know I. HASTY PUDDING.
From whence the source of happiness may flow:
Who to broil'd pudding would their thoughts have I sing of food, by British nurse design'd,
bent To make the stripling brave, and maiden kind. From bright Pewteria's love-sick discontent? Delay not, Muse, in numbers to rehearse
Yet so it was, Pewteria felt love's heat The pleasures of our life, and sinews of our verse. In fiercer flames than those which roast her meat. Let pudding's dish, most wholesome, be thy theme, No pudding's lost, but may with fresh delight And dip thy swelling plumes in fragrant cream. Be either fried next day, or broild at night.
Sing then that dish so fitting to improve
VII. MUTTON PUDDING.
But mutton, thou most nourishing of meat, Suinetimes the frugal matron seems in haste,
Whose single joint? may constitute a treat; Nor cares to beat her pudding into paste:
When made a pudding, you excel the rest
As much as that of other food is best!
· The two royal gardeners. KING. And still to stir away the bishop's-fout;
• A loin. KING,
reader with one, delivered by the first founder of They soon obey'd, and chopt him meat, mythology, Æsop himself. Maximus Planudes Gave him whatever he would eat; takes notice of it, as a very excellent part of his The lady care herself did take, production; and Phædrus, Camerarius, and others, Aud made a nest for Robin's sake : seem to agree, that his Eagle, and five others not But he perkt up into her chair, yet translated, are equal to any of his that are In which he plenteously did fare, handed down to us. Though Mr. Ogleby and sir Assuming quite another air. Roger L'Estrange bad the unhappiness to be unac The neighbours thought, when this they spyd, quainted with them, yet I had the good fortune to The world well mended on his side. discover them by the removal of my old library, With well-tun'd throat he whistled long, which has made me amends for the trouble of And every body lik'd his song. getting to where I now teach. They were written, “ At last,” said they,“ this little thing or dictated at least, by Æsop, in the fifty-fourth Will kill itself, so long to sing; Olympiad : and though I designed them chiefly We'll closet him among the rest for the use of my school, (this being translated by Of those my lady loves the best.” a youth designed for a Greek professor) yet no They little thought, that saw him come, man is so wise as not to need instruction, aye, and That Robins were so quarrelsome: by the way of fable too; since the holy scriptures The door they open'd, in he pops, themselves, the best instructors, teach us by way And to the highest perch he hops; of parable, symbol, image, and figure; and David The party-colourd birds he chose, was more moved with Nathan's “Thou art the The gold-finches, and such as those; man,” than all the most rigid lectures in the world With them he'd peck, and bill, and feed, would have done. Whoever will be at the trouble And very well (at times) agreed : of comparing this version with the original, let Canary-birds were his delight, them begin at the tenth line, and they will find it With them he'd téte-à-tête all night; metaphrastically done, verbum verbo, as the best But the brown linnets went to pot, way of justice to the author. Those that are mere He kill'd them all upon the spot, adorers of fines dóyou will not be angry that it is in The servants were employ'd each day, this sort of metre, for which I gave leave, the lad Instead of work, to part some fray, having a turn to this sort of measure, which is And wish'd the aukward fellow curst pleasant and agreeable, though not lofty. For my That brought him to my lady first. own part, I concur with my master Aristotle, that At last they all resolv'd upon't, ρυθμός και αρμονία are very far from being unneces Some way to tell my lady on't. sary or unpleasant. May this be of use to thee; Meanwhile he'ad had a noble swing, and it will please thine in all good wishes.
And rul'd just like the Gallic king;
Having kill'd or wounded all,
Unless the Eagle in the hall;
But hated him for his desert,
And bore him malice at his heart.
This Eagle was my lady's pride,
The guardian safety of her side:
He often brought home foreign prey,
Which humbly at her feet he lay.
For colour, pinions, and stature,
The fairest workmanship of Nature;
'Twould do one good to see him move, This lady had a little seat
So full of grandeur, grace, and love:
He was indeed a bird for Jove.
He soar'd aloft in Brucum's field,
And thousand kites and vultures kill'd;
Which made him dear to all that flew,
Unless to Robin and his crew.
One day poor Bob, puffd up with pride,
Thinking the combat to abide,
A goose-quill on for weapon tyd,
Knowing by use, that, now and then,
A sword less hurt does than a pen.
As for example-What at home
You've well contriv'd to do at Rome,
A pen blows up-before you come.
You are suppos'd to undermine
A pen can bite you with a line;
There's forty ways to give a sign. ing the reader to recollect the change which she Well-all on fire away he stalk'd, made in her ministry in 1709, the year in which Till come to where the Eagle walk'd. this poem was written; and referring to Rufinus. Bob did not shill-I shall-I go, N.
Nor said one word of friend or foe;
But Airting at him made a blow,
They made with hurry towards the lakes; As game-cocks with their gauntlets do.
And he his pinions o'er them shakes. At which the eagle gracefully
They had not (with such horrour fill?d) Cast a disdaining, sparkling eye;
The courage to let one be kill'd: As who should say-What's this, a fly?
They fied, and left no fue behind, But no revenge at all did take,
Unless it were the fleeting wind : He spar'd him for their lady's sake,
Only-a man by water took Who ponderd these things in her mind,
Two fine young merlins and a rook. And took the conduct of the eagle kind.
The family had now repose: Upon reflection now-to show
But with the Sun the Eagle rose; What harm the least of things may do,
Th’imperial bird pursu'd the foe, Mad Robin, with his cursed flirt,
More toil than rest inur'd to know. One of the eagle's Jeyes had hurt;
He wing'd his way to Latian land, Inflam'd it, made it red and sore :
Where first was hatch'd this murdering band; But the affront inflam'd it more.
He darted death where'er he came, Oh, how the family did tear!
Some of them dying at his name. To fire the house, could scarce forbear:
Their mighty foe-a fatal pledge, With scoru, not pain, the eagle fir'd,
Their bowels tore through every hedge : Murmur'd disdain, and so retir'd.
They flutter, sbriek, and caw, and hiss, Robin, to offer some relief,
Their strength decays, and fears increase : Io words like these would heal their grief:
But most the chevaliers the geese. “ Should th' Eagle die (which Heaven So many slaughter'd fowl there was, forbid !)
Their carcases block’d-up the ways; We ought some other to provide.
The rest he drove, half spent, pell-mell, I do not say that any now
Quite to the walls of Pontifell. Are fit, but in a year or two:
Robin at home, though mad to hear. And should this mighty warrior fall,
He should so conquer every where,
Expostulated thus with fear:
“ Ungrateful I, that so have stirr'd Misfortune seldom comes alone;
Against this generous, noble bird, Just in the moment this was done,
Wast thou not first by him preferr'd!” Ten thousand foes in sight were come:
Let's leave him in his gall to burn, Vultures, and kites, and birds of prey,
And back to Pontifell return. In flocks so thick--they darken'd day.
There some to chimney-tops aspire, A long-concerted force and strong,
To turrets some that could fly higher ; Vermin of all kinds made the throng;
Some 'bove a hundred miles were gone, Foxes were in the faction join'd,
To roost them at Byzantium. Who waited their approach to ground.
Alas! in vain was their pretence, By every hand, from common fame,
He broke through all their strong defence : : The frightful face of danger came.
Down went their fences, wires, and all ;
None hop'd his power to withstand,
But gave the nest to his command: Says, “Thousands more near sea appear ;
They told him of ten thousand more, They'll swop our chicken from the door;
In flocks along the Ganges' shore, We never were so set before:
Safe in their furrows, free from trouble, We're glad the Eagle will forget,
Like partridges among the stubble. And the invaders kill or beat.”
He spreads himself, and cuts the air, Reserv'd and great, his noble mind,
And steady fight soon brought him there, Above all pretty things inclin'd,
Lord, how deceiv'd and vex'd he was ! Abhorr'd the thoughts of any thing,
To find they were but meer jackdaws. But what his lady's peace could bring :
A hundred thousand all in light, Who bless'd him first, and bade him do
They all could chatter, not one fight, As he was wont, and beat the foe.
“ I'll deal by them as is their due : Burning and restless as the Sun,
Shough!” cry'd the eagle ; off they flew. Until this willing work was done;
His flashing eye their hearts confounds, He whets his talons, stretch'd his wings,
Though by their flight secure from wounds, His lightning darts, and terrour fings;
Which was a signal, fatal baulk Towers with a flight into the sky,
To a late swift Italian hawk. These million monsters to descry,
The Eagle would no rest afford, Prepard to conquer, or to die.
Till he had sent my lady word; The party, that so far was come,
Who when she heard the dear surprise, Thought not the eagle was at home:
Wonder and joy stood in her eyes. To fame and danger usd in field,
“ My faithful Eagle, bast thou then They knew he'd quickly make them yield: My mortal foes destroy'd again? But, on assurance he was near,
Return, return, and on me wait; locumberd, faint, and dead with fear,
Be thou the guardian of my gate;
Thee and thy friends are worth my care, 3 Oplanu, amongst the Greeks, signifies " Ho. Thy foes (if any such there are) pour as tender as the eye." KING.
Shall my avenging anger share."