derstanding and how unclean my conscience! how confused my inward thoughts, unenlightened and undevout! and that not from the fault of another, but mine only. Sometimes, however, seeking a way to the inner, and thinking in secret, I dwell on the blessings of an elect soul; what heavenly joys and spiritual delights it has in its heart, what peace, what tranquillity, what hope and rejoicing in GOD its SAVIOUR, whose speech is sweet, and appearance lovely. And brief though be the time of the stay, yet full of rapture is it withal.

7. But when I think of these things, and Thou enlightenest my darkness, I find many just causes of complaint against myself; and discover by the hidden streams of grace that such and such is the soul closely united to Thee, and thus and thus Thou speakest unto it. It is silent on all things sensible, and Thou speakest to it in spirit of the invisible. It seems as if deserted by all creatures, and Thou consolest it in an ineffable manner. Thus again I spake in my heart: Alas! for the sinful soul, the burthened conscience, lukewarm conversation, not having the light of grace, nor spiritual consolation, seeking tears and finding That soul has peace which sincerely loves CHRIST, and never turns away its eyes from Him, but always asks what is pleasing to Him, because it shall walk in peace and righteousness, and the

none.

stranger intermeddleth not with its joy. It will find that silent waiting on Him is good, and shall taste that sweet is the LORD its GOD, in Whom it trusteth. It will be far removed from external tumults, and shall wait to its great advantage for His arrival unto its inmost parts. Lo! thus doth GOD work in His elect vessels. If any go unto Him he shall not return empty, for He willingly gives water to the thirsty, and bread to the hungry.

8. My GOD, when Thou enterest into the soul that loves Thee, wilt Thou not feed it with milk, and of Thy great sweetness lead it out of itself, to embrace Thee without any bodily image? O truth, truth, how much doth charity avail and do? Then Thou speakest Thy word to it most secretly, and showest it things new and old in most blessed charity, and fruition whereat all human words are feeble. Henceforth Thou makest it trust most fully in Thee, as to eternal rest, and the society of the saints; since by giving beforehand an earnest of spiritual grace, Thou makest it stronger in hoping for the unseen, and despising the present, seen by the senses. Remember me a poor beggar, O gracious FATHER, by the bowels of Thy mercy, and send down the true bread from heaven, even Thy holy word full of consolation and grace.

CHAPTER XI.

Of Great Sweetness and Consolation in God.

"ALL my bones shall say, LORD, who is like unto Thee ?" 1 He is one, and there is none like Him; He is my GOD, and there is none in comparison with Him. My best beloved and most faithful Friend, Who never leaves, but willingly unites Himself with them that love Him; and if for a while He hides Himself, and allows one to be straitened, it is not to cast away, but to try, cleanse, and instruct. He does not then altogether leave, but even more wisely teaches what each one is by himself, and to what he hath attained. Thou art beautiful, my Beloved, and very lovely, not to the flesh, but to the mind,— not to the eye, nor any of the senses, but to the believing soul, that hath a pure heart, and hath transferred itself to the invisible and spiritual. Whoso would be united to Thee by devotion, must needs mortify all carnal affections in himself, and above all, preserve purity of heart. For Thou art displeased if any goeth to frail creatures in quest of consolation. Therefore Thou callest me within to love Thee, and orderest me to wait for Thee, because then I shall find Thee as often as I despise

1 Ps. XXXV. 10.

myself; and as Thou willest so will I. And this will be my whole good, to love and serve Thee freely, fearing no loss, making no terms with love, because Thou delightest in the soul that loves Thee simply. Oh, that one, united to Thee alone in life and death! But I am cast out far from Thee; oft I go in other ways, and seek another end than I ought.

mercy, Thine "Thy kingdom Thy dominion Thou arrangest

2. But that I may not perish with them, may I the more quickly return, by considering Thy praises in them, and fixing my affections upon Thee. Grant me, O LORD my GOD, Who hast made all things out of nothing, out of all to praise Thy holy Name; for Thine is the power, Thine the wisdom, Thine the goodness and the Eternal Majesty and glory. is an everlasting kingdom, and from generation to generation." 1 all things above and on earth; Thou knowest all things, and holdest them in Thy hand; nothing opposes, nothing disturbs Thee; but in tranquillity Thou judgest all, and makest even the rebellious subject to Thee and serve Thee. Thou knowest all that is done in the world, and fixest their bounds before they take place. Thou art the GOD of heaven and earth, the Creator and Governor of visible and invisible, and the Dis

1 Ps. cxlv. 13.

voice. What then shall it be, if we ask Himself? Let us ask. O LORD, art Thou He, of Whom the men of old have spoken, and Whom all things in their seasons serve?

11. "I am that I am, and besides Me is none other." I am the first and the last, creating and governing all things. "I live, saith the LORD, because I will reign for ever and ever."

12. What sayest thou now, little worm, surrounded by so great a light? Behold thy Beloved, Whom thou thoughtest with me, speaketh with thee. He was with me, when I said to Him, "It is good for me to cleave steadfastly unto GOD." He will be with thee, if thou also sayest: "My soul refused comfort, and I coveted not the day of man; but in Thee, O LORD, will I trust, for Thou art my King and my GOD." Thou must not be like inconstant lovers, but as one clinging to one alone, seeking one alone, who admits no rival from without. Let then thy converse be with Him alone; and if He depart, sit as a widow patiently bearing all things. For this is His manner to go, and return, and to prove His beloved, and make her perfect in love. Let not His departure disturb thee, when thou longest for His approach. Wait, wait again; for a while He will go, in a while return. All this however love effects, which 3 Ps. lxxvii. 2.

1 Exod. iii. 14.

2 Ps. x. 16.