Изображения страниц

- " About those conditions?” Well, now you go And do as I tell you, and then you 'll know. Once a year, on Commencement day, If you 'll only take the pains to stay, You 'll see the President in the CHAIR, Likewise the Governor sitting there. The President rises ; both old and young May hear his speech in a foreign tongue, The meaning whereof, as lawyers swear, Is this: Can I keep this old arm-chair? And then his Excellency bows, As much as to say that he allows. The Vice-Gub. next is called by name; He bows like t’ other, which means the same. And all the officers round 'em bow, As much as to say that they allow. And a lot of parchments about the chair Are handed to witnesses then and there, And then the lawyers hold it clear That the chair is safe for another year.

God bless you, Gentlemen! Learn to give
Money to colleges while you live.
Don't be silly and think you 'll try
To bother the colleges, when you die,

With codicil this, and codicil that,
That Knowledge may starve while Law grows fat;
For there never was pitcher that would n't spill,
And there's always a flaw in a donkey's will !

[merged small][merged small][merged small][ocr errors]

PROFESSOR. TELL me, O Provincial ! speak, Ceruleo-Nasal ! Lives there one De Sauty extant now among you, Whispering Boanerges, son of silent thunder,

Holding talk with nations ?

Is there a De Sauty ambulant on Tellus,
Bifid-cleft like mortals, dormient in night-cap,
Having sight, smell, hearing, food-receiving feature

Three times daily patent?

Breathes there such a being, O Ceruleo-Nasal ?
Or is he a mythus, — ancient word for “humbug," —
Such as Livy told about the wolf that wet-nursed

Romulus and Remus?

Was he born of woman, this alleged De Sauty ?
Or a living product of galvanic action,
Like the acarus bred in Crosse's flint-solution ?

Speak, thou Cyano-Rhinal !


Many things thou askest, jackknife-bearing stranger, Much-conjecturing mortal, pork-and-treacle-waster! Pretermit thy whittling, wheel thine ear-flap toward me,

Thou shalt hear them answered.

When the charge galvanic tingled through the cable,
At the polar focus of the wire electric
Suddenly appeared a white-faced man among us :

Called himself “ DE Sauty.”

As the small opossum held in pouch maternal
Grasps the nutrient organ whence the term mammalia,
So the unknown stranger held the wire electric,

Sucking in the current.

When the current strengthened, bloomed the pale-faced

stranger, — Took no drink nor victual, yet grew fat and rosy, And from time to time, in sharp articulation,

Said, “ All right! De Sauty.”

From the lonely station passed the utterance, spreading Through the pines and hemlocks to the groves of steeples, Till the land was filled with loud reverberations

Of “ All right! De Sauty.”

When the current slackened, drooped the mystic stran

ger, — Faded, faded, faded, as the stream grew weaker, Wasted to a shadow, with a hartshorn odor

Of disintegration.

Drops of deliquescence glistened on his forehead,
Whitened round his feet the dust of efflorescence,
Till one Monday morning, when the flow suspended,

There was no De Sauty.

Nothing but a cloud of elements organic,
C. O. H. N. Ferrum, Chlor. Flu. Sil. Potassa,
Calc. Sod. Phosph. Mag. Sulphur, Mang. (?) Alumin. (?)

Cuprum, (?)
Such as man is made of.

Born of stream galvanic, with it he had perished !
There is no De Sauty now there is no current !
Give us a new cable, then again we 'll hear him

Cry, All right ! DE SAUTY.”

« ПредыдущаяПродолжить »