Ye! who in Granta's honours would surpass,

Must mount her Pegasus, a full-grown 969

ass; A foal well worthy of her ancient Dam, Whose Helicon is duller than her Cam.

There CLARKE, still striving piteously "to please,"

Forgetting doggerel leads not to degrees,

1 This person, who has lately betrayed the most rabid symptoms of confirmed authorship, is writer of a poem denominated The Art of Pleasing, as Lucus a non lucendo," containing little pleasantry, and less poetry. He also acts as monthly stipendiary and collector of calumnies for the Satirist. If this unfortunate young man would exchange the magazines for the mathematics, and endeavour to take a decent degree in his university, it might eventually prove more serviceable than his present salary. Note.- - An unfortunate young person of Emmanuel College, Cambridge, ycleped Hewson Clarke, has lately manifested the most rabid symptoms of confirmed Authorship, His Disorder commenced some years ago, and the Newcastle Herald teemed with his precocious essays, to the great edification of the Burgesses of Newcastle, Morpeth, and the parts adjacent even unto Berwick-upon-Tweed. These have since been abundantly scurrilous upon the [town] of Newcastle, his native spot, Mr Mathias and Anacreon Moore. What these men had done to offend Mr. Hewson Clarke is not known, but surely the town in whose markets he had sold meat, and in whose weekly journal he had written prose, deserved better treatment. Mr H. C. should recollect the proverb 'tis a villainous bird that defiles his own nest." He now writes in the Satirist. We recommend the young man to abandon the magazines for mathematics, and to believe that a high degree at Cambridge will be more advantageous, as well as profitable in the end, than his present precarious gleanings.

[Hewson Clarke (1787-circ. 1832) was entered at Emmanuel College, Cambridge, circ. 1806 (see Postscript). He migrated to London, where he devoted his not inconsiderable talents to contributions to the Satirist, the Scourge, etc. He wrote inter alia, a continuation of Hume's History of England, 2 vols. (1832).

The Satirist, a monthly magazine illustrated with coloured cartoons, was issued 1808-1814. "The Diary of a Cantab" (June, 1808, ii. 368) contains some verses of "Lord B--n to his Bear. To the tune of Lachin y gair." The last verse runs thus:

"But when with the ardour of Love I am burning, I feel for thy torments, I feel for thy care; And weep for thy bondage, so truly discerning What's felt by a Lord, may be felt by a Bear.' In August, 1808 (iii. 78-86), there is a critique on Poems Original and Translated, in which the bear plays many parts. Hence the castigation of "the sizar of Emmanuel College."]

1" Right enough: this was well deserved, and well laid on." B., 1816.

2"Into Cambridgeshire the Emperor Probus transported a considerable body of Vandals.' Gibbon's Decline and Fall, ii. 83. There is no reason to doubt the truth of this assertion; the breed is still in high perfection.

J This gentleman's name requires no praise: the man who in translation displays unquestionable genius may be well expected to excel in original composition, of which it is to be hoped, we shall soon see a splendid specimen. [Francis Hodgson (1781-1852) was Byron's lifelong friend. His Juvenal appeared in 1807; Lady Jane Grey and other Poems, in 1800; Sir Edgar, a Tale, in 1810. He became Provost of Eton in 1840.]

4 Hewson Clarke, Esq., as it is written. The Aboriginal Britons, an excellent poem, by Richards. [The Rev. George Richards, D.D. (1767-1835), a Fellow of Oriel, and, afterwards, Rector of St Martin's-in-the-Fields. The Abo riginal Britons, a prize poem, was published in 1792.]

No just applause her honoured name shall lose,

As first in freedom, dearest to the Muse.

Oh! would thy bards but emulate thy fame,

And rise more worthy, Albion, of thy name!

What Athens was in science, Rome in power,

What Tyre appeared in her meridian hour,

'Tis thine at once, fair Albion! to have

--

1000

been Earth's chief Dictatress, Ocean's lovely Queen:

But Rome decayed, and Athens strewed the plain,

And Tyre's proud piers lie shattered in the main;

Like these, thy strength may sink in ruin hurled,

And Britain fall, the bulwark of the world.

But let me cease, and dread Cassandra's fate,

With warning ever scoffed at, till too late;

To themes less lofty still my lay confine, And urge thy Bards to gain a name like thine.

Then, hapless Britain! be thy rulers blest,

ΠΟΙΟ

The Senate's oracles, the people's jest! Still hear thy motley orators dispense The flowers of rhetoric, though not of

sense,

While CANNING'S colleagues hate him for his wit,

And old dame PORTLAND1 fills the place of PITT.

1 A friend of mine being asked, why his Grace of Portland was likened to an old woman? reped, he supposed it was because he was past bearing." His Grace is now gathered to his grandmothers, where he sleeps as sound as ever; fut even his sleep was better than his colleagues' Waking. 1811. [William Henry Cavendish, third Duke of Portland (1738-1809), was Prime Minister in 1807, till his death in 1800. When Byron meditated a tour to India in 1808, Portand declined to write on his behalf to the Directors of the East India Company, and couched his refusal in terms which Byron fancied to be offensive.]

4 Lord Elgin would fain persuade us that all the figures, with and without noses, in his stoneshop, are the work of Phidias! "Credat Judæus!" [R. Payne Knight, in his introduction to Specimens of Ancient Sculpture, published 1800, throws a doubt on the Phidian workmanship of the "Elgin" marbles.]

5 Mr Gell's Topography of Troy and Ithaca cannot fail to ensure the approbation of every man possessed of classical taste, as well for the information Mr Gell conveys to the mind of the reader, as for the ability and research the respective works display.

[Sir William Gell (1777-1836) published the Topography of Troy (1804), the Geography and Antiquities of Ithaca (1807), and the Itinerary of Greece (1810). Byron reviewed the two last works in the Monthly Review (August, 1811). Fresh from the scenes, he speaks with authority.

"With Homer in his pocket and Gell on his sumpter-mule, the Odysseus tourist may now make a very classical and delightful excursion." The epithet in the original MS. was "coxcomb," but becoming acquainted with Gell while the satire was in the press, Byron changed it to "classic." In the fifth edition he altered it to "rapid," and appended this note:-"Rapid,' indeed! He topographised and typographised King Priam's dominions in three days! I called him 'classic' before I saw the Troad, but since have learned better than to tack to his name what don't belong to it."]

1"Singular enough, and din enough, God knows." B., 1816.

I suppose I must say of JEFFREY as Sir ANDREW AGUECHEEK saith, "an I had known he was so cunning of fence, I had seen him damned ere I had fought him." What a pity it is that I shall be beyond the Bosphorus before the next number

"The greater part of this satire I most sincerely wish had never been written not only on account of the injustice of much of the critical, and some of the personal part of it but the tone and temper are such as I cannot approve." -- BYRON. July 14, 1816. Diodati, Geneva.

has passed the Tweed! But I yet hope to light my pipe with it in Persia.1

My Northern friends have accused me, with justice, of personality towards their great literary Anthropophagus, JEFFREY; but what else was to be done with him and his dirty pack, who feed by "lying and slandering," and slake their thirst by "evil speaking"? I have adduced facts already well known, and of JEFFREY'S mind I have stated my free opinion, nor has he thence sustained acy injury: what scavenger was ever soiled by being pelted with mud? It may be said that I quit England because I have censured there "persons of honour and wit about town"; but I am coming back again, and their vengeance will keep hot till my return. Those who know me can testify that my motives for leaving England are very different from fears, literary or personal; those who do not, may one day be convinced. Since the publication of this thing, my name has not been concealed; I have been mostly in London, ready to answer for my transgressions, and in daily expectation of sundry cartels; but, alas! "the age of chivalry is over," or, in the vulgar tongue, there is no spirit now-a-days.

There is a youth ycleped Hewson Clarke (subaudi esquire), a sizar of Emmanuel College, and, I believe, a denizen of Berwick-upon-Tweed, whom I have introduced in these pages to much better company than he has been accustomed to meet; he is, notwithstanding, a very sad dog, and for no

[The article never appeared, and Lord Byron, in the Hints from Horace, taunted Jeffrey with a silence which seemed to indicate that the critic was beaten from the field.]

reason that I can discover, except a personal quarrel with a bear, kept by me at Cambridge to sit for a fellowship, and whom the jealousy of his Trinity contemporaries prevented from success, has been abusing me, and, what is worse, the defenceless innocent above mentioned, in the Satirist for one year and some months. I am utterly unconscious of having given him any provocation; indeed, I am guiltless of having heard his name, till coupled with the Satirist. He has therefore no reason to complain, and I dare say that, like Sir Fretful Plagiary, he is rather pleased than otherwise. I have now mentioned all who have done me the honour to notice me and mine, that is, my bear and my book, except the editor of the Satirist, who, it seems, is a gentleman God wot! I wish he could impart a little of his gentility to his subordinate scribblers. I hear that Mr. JERNINGHAM' is about to take up the cudgels for his Mæcenas, Lord Carlisle. I hope not: he was one of the few, who, in the very short intercourse I had with him, treated me with kindness when a boy; and whatever he may say or do, "pour on, I will endure." I have nothing further to add, save a general note of thanksgiving to readers, purchasers, and publishers, and in the words of Scott, I wish

"To all and each a fair good night,

And rosy dreams and slumbers light."

1[Edward Jerningham (1727-1812), third son of Sir George Jerningham, Bart., was an indefatigable versifier. Between the publication of his first poem, The Nunnery, in 1762, and his last, The Old Bard's Farewell, in 1812, he sent to the press no less than thirty separate compositions.]

1[A fragment, 156 lines, of Hints from Horace, as first published in Recollections of the Life of R. C. Dallas, 1824. The full text of the poem was not published till 1831.]

2 [Sir Thomas Lawrence (1769-1830) succeeded West as P.R.A. in 1820. Benjamin West (1738-1820) had been elected P.R.A. in 1792, on the death of Sir Joshua Reynolds.]

is,

In an English newspaper, which finds its way abroad wherever there are Englishmen, I read an account of this dirty dauber's caricature of Mr H - as a "beast," and the consequent action, etc. The circumstance probably, too well known to require further comment. [Thomas Hope (1770-1831) was celebrated for his collections of pictures, sculp ture, and bric-a-brac. He was the author of Anastasius, or Memoirs of a Greck, etc., which was attributed to Byron, and, according to Lady Blessington, excited his envy. "Low Dubost" was a French painter, who, in revenge for some fancied injustice, caricatured Hope and his wife as Beauty and the Beast.]

But daub a shipwreck like an alehouse sign; You plan a vase - it dwindles to a pot; Then glide down Grub Street - fasting and forgot;

Laughed into Lethe by some quaint Review,

Whose wit is never troublesome till true.

In fine, to whatsoever you aspire, Let it at least be simple and entire.

"While pure Description held the place of Sense." Pope, Prol. to the Sat., 1. 148.