HEART BREATHINGS. "Do thou for me, O God the Lord."-Ps. cix. 21. What in this ever-changing world My heart, O Lord, is in thy hands; Nor suffer aught but what will be Grant not my heart's desire, O Lord, Thou art that Friend. To thee alone In every time of care and woe Do thou my refuge be. Yes, this is all that I would ask, That thou my lot wouldst choose; I am so prone to err that I Keep thou my feet firm on the Rock, Affliction with thy people, Lord, Rather than spend my life with those Do thou for me, O God the Lord, In providence and grace; Then, when on earth my course is run, I'll rest in thy embrace. E. D. I write from experience. I have tried him, and he hath sorely tried me; and yet we make shift to hang together to this day. And sure I am that I cannot mend myself; and, as he came to save sinners, I know not where he can mend himself; for there never was a worse wretch than I am. We cannot do without him, and as he makes us know that we are lost, and he came to save those that were lost, so he cannot do without us; for he must see of the travail of his soul, and bring many sons to glory. Without him we may truly say we can do nothing, and without such as we are, what could he do? If none are wounded, there can be none to bind up. If there are none sick, what has the Physician to do? And if no debtors, the Suretyship undertakings must be in vain. If no strayed sheep, nothing for the seeking and gathering Shepherd to do. O, my brother, be of good cheer!-Huntington. LETTER BY THE LATE MR. CROUCH TO MR. COVELL. Beloved Brother,-For my forgetfulness, pardon the neglect of writing to you; and for my slothfulness, say that you will readily forgive. I certainly had forgotten that it was my turn to write, therefore wondered that no epistle came from the abundance of thy heart, seeing that thou art very active in the use of thy pen. In person, I was from home when yours arrived, and since, and still have the rod of afflictions on myself and my yokefellow,-light on myself, but heavier on her; not because I am the least sinner, or the better saint, or more abundant in good works. But whether afflictions are laid upon myself, partner, or family, I have no difficulty in ascertaining the cause, nor dare, nor desire to palm the cause upon others that are about me; for although, through grace, I fall not into outward sins to disgrace my office and bring reproach upon the cause of God and truth, yet do I see and feel sin in everything I say or do. I know something of the meaning of "Aaron and his sons bearing the iniquity of the holy things." For when I pray, or read, or preach, I perceive that sin is interwoven therein; therefore I have always cause to cry, "Father, forgive, for the merits of thy only-begotten Son, Jesus Christ." Therefore, if, through grace, I fall not outwardly so as to call for stripes, yet, from the unavoidable sinfulness of my nature, and the consenting of the will of the flesh therein, I do, and that daily. Besides, I know the truth of this scripture: "And if ye will not for all this hearken unto me, but walk contrary unto me, then I will walk contrary unto you also in fury;" and, "I, even I, will chastise you seven times for your sins." Thus, I take it, God's word is his revealed will and my daily rule of walk. First before him, in faith: "These things were written that ye might believe on the Son of God, and that believing ye might have life through his name." Secondly, in humility. See Micah vi. 8; Col. iii. 12. Thirdly, in love. See Paul to the Ephesians, v. 2. Fourthly, circumspectly, conscientiously regarding all that the Lord has commanded, as Peter hath it: "Having a good conscience." Which will be the effect of believing, loving, and obeying the written word, or of doing the will of my heavenly Father. Fifthly, with godly fear. See Acts ix. 31. Sixthly, with a single eye to the glory and honour of our Lord Jesus Christ. Now, although eternal election has made me safe and secure for eternal glory, redemption by Christ has purchased me for God, and regeneration, pardon, justification, sanctification, makes me meet for it; yet my present estate as a child-an adopted child, cannot be comfortable without walking before the Lord with the Lord, and finding him to walk with me; and also before the men of the world, so as to give them no occasion to speak evil or blasphemously of the good ways of God. If this is not regarded, how can it be said that we stop the mouths of gainsayers, or that we have a good conscience before men, also before good men, so as not to offend, grieve, or stumble them? Without this no man can be said to walk charitably toward his brethren. Now, for the present (the Lord be praised), I would not halt, or turn aside to the right or the left, or linger, or sleep, or move heavily in the way of the Lord. Much earnestness and diligence I once possessed in seeking after the salvation of the Lord for my poor sinful, lost, and naked soul; much zeal I manifested for the Lord when he delivered my soul; and why should I not pursue after the same manner at this time? I hope I can say the care and concern of my soul is as great as ever it was, the glory and honour of the Lord Jesus as dear as ever it was, and my main concern to finish well my race. Besides, was I to be assured of the kingdom of God, even if I walked as nature doth very often list; yet in my renewed mind I desire it not in any such way; for not only for heaven do I pant that I may escape the dreadful estate of hell, but for the enjoyment of the presence of God while in this tabernacle and pilgrimage state; for this is all my pleasure and delight to see the Lord going before, and his glory bringing up the rearward. To be at a point about my personal interest in the Lord Jesus as Paul was, and to know that I walk with God as Enoch did, is a subject of no mean consideration. My last year was attended with some remarkable interpositions, both in providence and grace, and this was one of bringing my faith to some greater strength and establishment than ever it was before. I mean when without the feeling sense of his gracious presence or loving-kindness shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost. How is this? Why, the feeling sense does often vary, change, and decline. But, says the Scripture, "For ever, O Lord, thy word is settled in heaven." And again: "Heaven and earth shall pass away, but my word shall not pass away." Besides, Peter says, "We have also a more sure word of prophecy, whereunto we do well that we take heed." Now, when sense does ebb and decline, these are testimonies that faith may, will, and does venture upon, and thus an establishment will take place. Again, in feeling sense, we may seem to be at a stand. But Paul says, "Being confident of this very thing, that he that has begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ." Here, then, is authority for a steady, fixed, habitual faith. Every year we are learning, if it be but a little. Then we increase in knowledge and understanding; then wisdom and knowledge shall be the stability of thy times, and strength of salvation. True, we are often tossed to and fro like the locust, but in the power of God we have everlasting strength. To follow sense the saints have often been misled, and often spoken wrong of the dispensations of the Almighty, as Jacob did when he said all these things were against him, and David, when he declared there was but a step between him and death. Now as, on the one side, these and other such like cases will cause mistakes, all arising from the judgment acting from feeling sense; so also upon the other side of the question, even the comfortable sense of the love, mercy, and favour of the Lord. David with these once said, "In my prosperity I said I shall never be moved," but this was a mistake; for a little while afterwards, when light, love, and joy declined, he said, “Thou hidest thy face, and I am troubled." Therefore he was very soon moved; but when he judged of his state by the word, work, power, faithfulness, and immutability of God, then he says, "The Lord is my Rock, my Fortress, and my Deliverer;" and as Paul says, "He will deliver." Well, then, I myself often feared when there was no occasion, and judged erroneously of my state by feeble sense; but now in retracing what is past, and viewing the standing testimonies and promises of the word and the oath of the Lord to make all valid and sure, I have humbly ventured to say, "He is my God, my Father, my Saviour, and my Friend." So, being settled and grounded in the faith, I humbly say, "At what time I am afraid I will trust in him." Mrs. C. is very poorly and very well, in sickness and good health. I have one child very poorly; but I am labouring to say, Thy will, O Lord, be done. I know and believe that all things, however painful, shall work together for my good. The Lord bless you. Yours in the Lord, Feb., 1841. THE SET TIME. W. CROUCH. My very dear Sister in the best of all Bonds,-You may, perhaps, be surprised at my being able to address you thus; but O, my dear girl, how can I feel grateful enough to the dear Lord of heaven and earth that ever he should in mercy look upon one so vile and so unworthy as I am in and of myself? The set time has indeed come to favour my poor soul with that peace which passeth all understanding, that which the world can neither give nor take away. Truly that mind is kept in perfect peace that is stayed upon the Lord. Every heart knoweth its own bitterness, and a stranger intermeddleth not with its joys. My dear H., do not sink if you are not as yet able to use this blessed language, for the time shall surely come when "Each shall clearly see Not only that he shed his blood, But each shall say, For me.' Wait on the Lord, be of good courage; he shall strengthen thy heart. Wait, I say, on the Lord. Truly he has a set time to favour Zion; and O, my dear, it is sure to be the best time. O! What wisdom you will find when the Lord unfolds the blessed secret to your poor soul. O that little germ of eternal life! T When it was implanted, though small as a grain of mustard seed at the beginning, it is an incorruptible seed that can never die, Truly, my dear, I have found and do still find that it is through much tribulation we must enter the kingdom; but be of good cheer; more is he that is with us than all they that can be against us. There was a time when I thought, "O! If I could speak of these blessed things with certainty, I could then settle down; but ah, no! I find I am just as helpless as ever. I cannot see the blessed chain that binds my soul to the Three-One God, only as the blessed Spirit is pleased to shine; and then, O how plainly it is seen! what hairbreadth escapes! But they are effectual escapes, notwithstanding. O! What wondrous love shines through the whole! There is indeed no spot upon earth so sweet as when the soul is realizing conquests over death and sin. Perhaps, my dear sister, you are inquiring how and when I came to this blessed spot. I will tell you. The evening after I saw you last I had the privilege of hearing our dear friend Mr. Hull, who took for his text these words: "There be many which say, Who will show us any good? Lord, lift thou up the light of thy countenance upon us." I could truly say that was the desire of my heart. He first spoke of the world, who were continually crying, "Who will show us any good?" And then turned the subject upon those poor souls who were made to feel, "What will it profit a man if he shall gain the whole world and lose his own soul?" and who could feelingly say that it would give them more pleasure than all that it was possible to possess in this world to enjoy the light of the Lord's countenance, and as surely as that desire is wrought, so surely should it be granted. "Well," I thought, "perhaps the time is come at last. But no; my strength was not all gone yet; it was the means in the hands of the Lord of comforting me and enabling me to press forward. But O! There was some hard work after that till the following Saturday, when these words were applied: "Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love; therefore with loving-kindness have I drawn thee." There was something seemed to say they did not belong to me; but I believed that they did, and so it proved. Up to the following Saturday, O the wrestling and struggling there was! But, blessed be the name of the Lord, he did then unfold the blessed secret. It was when my own strength was all gone, and there was none shut up nor left, that he was of infinite value to my soul. Ah! He must be everything or nothing. O that blessed ring of everlasting love! Never was I so happy in all my life as then. I could welcome death; I felt "Through floods and flames, if Jesus leads, I'll follow where he goes; Hinder me not, shall be my cry, Hastings, Sept. 16, 1872. Your most affectionate Sister, S. |