cacy. I hope we fhall find a good merchant for him, among the ladies of quality. MERCURY. I question much whether that delicacy as you call it, will recommend him to their notice: On the whole, I am afraid we shall bring our hogs to a bad market. I have no great hopes, to tell you the truth, from this business. APOLLO. There's no help for it. Now we are in, we must make the best of a bad bargain, as the faying is. Tho' I hope, Mercury, you will not be scrupulous, but when you set your Authors up to fale, fhew them out to the best Advantage, giving them all the praises and applauses you can think of, and all the great and good qualities that come into your head, no matter how juft, or whether they deserve it or no. MERCURY. Truft me for that. What! don't you know I'm an old auctioneer? End of the first Scene. ་ SCENE II. SPEAKER S. CRYER, APOLLO, MERCURY, BOOKSELLERS, AUTHORS, AUDIENCE, MANAGERS, DOGS. A CRYER. UTHORS felling by auction. Walk in gentlemen and ladies. Selling by auction. Authors felling by Auction. APOLLO. Husband your breath a little, my friend. 'Tis but just twelve yet, and we shall not have much company till towards one.----I am very glad, Mercury, to hear the anonymous Authors are fo much mended in their appearance. But alas! poor Doctor J-------n. What we gain by thefe, I am afraid, we shall lofe, and much more by Him. Poor man! what a piteous taking he has been in. I fufpect fome rafcal has poifoned him with a view to his pension, MERCURY. You remember I told you he complained of the gripes this morning. What is he actually dead? APOLLO. Not quite. But he is dead to us. You can't imagine what a pickle he has left the water closet in. All his excellent Ramblers, as they are called, are gone thro' him, quite thro'. MERCURY. Well, I now fufpect the caufe. I was told the whole affair this forenoon. But did he receive no benefit from his convivial Burton? I left him at that and his toaft and nutmeg. APOLLO. Just the reverse. He had no fooner ate his breakfast than he fell grievously ill. I was fent for; I found him fpeechlefs, all over in a cold fweat, his pulfe quite gone, and afflicted with a moft terrible and continued purging. This latter fymptom being the most dangerous and the cause of all the reft, I used my utmost endeavours to stop it, and with great difficulty fucceeded at last. About an hour before I left him he had recovered his fpeech. But alas! he is no more the man he was. other people, not as he were out of a book. He fpeaks now like used to do, as if it Were he to write, I fuppofe fuppofe it would be in the fame manner. So we need not fet him up to fale; for we should get nothing for him. Besides, he is such a pitiable object. What excufe fhall we make, should the good company call for him, as undoubtedly they will? MERCURY. Why, tell 'em the truth, to be fure; and as I am acquainted with the whole bufinefs, let me be the fpokefman.-----But do you know what expence the anonymous authors will put us to, before we can difpofe of one of 'em.---Nay, you need not wonder, and hold up your hands, and caft up your eyes, in the manner you do. 'Tis already done, and we are already engaged for a greater fum by much, and all on Their account, than the expence of catching them, a breakfaft of Gin and Half-penny Rolls, wafh ing, fcrubbing, loufing, and even cloathing 'em will amount to. APOLLO. Mercury, could I any way do without you, I would abfolutely diffolve the partnership this moment. You will ruin us with your your mad projects and extravagance. Unlefs we make a quick retreat to Olympus, we shall be arrested and lie rotting in a goal. You know it was much against my inclination to have any thing to do with these anonymous Authors. I always faid they were nothing but lumber, and that we should never get any good by them. But pray what have you done? MERCURY. Nay, I began to be of the fame opinion, and to repent of it myself. But it was too late to draw back. In fhort, I was informed by an intimate acquaintance, one thoroughly verfed in thefe matters, that we could expect nothing for fuch Authors, from Patrons, Minifters of State, Noblemen, Gentlemen or Ladies of Quality; and that all our market for them muft lie among the Bookfellers. I was told befides, that thefe Bookfellers would not bid fo much as one farthing, till their bellies were filled with the best of victuals, and their heads well heated with the beft of liquors. So, what do you think I do? I go to Tomkins's, at the Shakespeare, where you may be thank ful |