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"The devil in a bottle! What a sight!"
"I'd give my eyes to get behind the scenes
And see him raise the devil!" said one wight.
"I'll see the devil, though I die of fright,"
A second cried. "La! don't you think he means,"
The ladies asked, "to cork the bottle tight ?"
In short, old, young, sick, healthy, married, single,
Were seen to run, and rush, and meet, and mingle,
Declaiming, raving, questioning and answering,
Concerning this new stroke of necromancering,
Invented by the marvellous Von Dunder;

And all, of every rank and either gender,
Agreed in calling it the hugest wonder

Wrought since the epoch of the Witch of Endor.

The eventful night arrived; and you may guess
The house had not a vacant inch of ground:
Tremendous was the throng-intense the press-
And though each ticket was a golden guilder
The congregated multitude soon found

The theatre too small, and groaned the builder!
At length out stepped the Conjuror. He bowed,
Amid the uproarious greetings of the crowd,
And, holding up a bottle in his hand, he

Addressed them thus-" Respected gentlefolks!
This bottle here contains-three pints of brandy!"
"How !-brandy!" was the cry, "What! is't a hoax ?"
By no means," quoth the Conjuror. "But list!

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Here be three pints of brandy!"-" Come! no bam !"—
Now, my good people, I, Von Dunder, am,

And swear to be, as long as I exist,

A-" "What? Go on!"

"A staunch tee-to-ta-list;

And so, you mind, I cannot wet my throttle

With any of this stuff!"—"Ah! Bah!" cried all,
And fierce and stormy grew the general call,-

"No humbug! Shew the devil in a bottle!

You have pledged your promise, and we know what's what!"
Just so; I am come to that, you understand,"

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Replied Von Dunder, "and I needn't shrink;'

For when a thirsty dog like me has got
A bottle full of brandy in his hand
The devil's in it if he cannot drink !"

What, Gellert!-What! another anticipatory Peter-Pindarism? Then, sir, es ist um Sie geschehn, it is all over with you; you have dished yourself. All the water in the Liffey, distributed into wash-hand basins-all the truncheon soaps in Sackville-street would not purify you. Hic niger est—we at tach the label to your brow-you are black

"To that complexion have you come at last."

We abandon you-we turn you upwe fling you down-we cast you from us as Lear cast Goneril-we place you high upon a dusty shelf-there

To lie in cold oblivion, and to-roost."

You have repeatedly disregarded the principles established by Quintilian and illustrated by La Motte-and you shall pay the penalty. We remember the vow we have registered. Ours is the stern determination of Bethlem Gabor when he thrust St. Leon into the dungeon to woo, upon an empty stomach,

"Silence and Darkness, solemn sisters, twins!"

We now close your volume with six
and thirty seals of black wax, each
bearing the impression of a Gorgon's
head. And the volume so closed let
no Irishman henceforth open,
Quoth

THE OUT-AND-OUTER.

STANDARD BOOK FOR THE COUNTY TREASURERS OF IRELAND.*

We are happy to find that the sciences of political economy and of statistics are at length beginning to make their way into Ireland, and that a more general knowledge is diffused of those principles that regulate, not only our internal relations, but also our commercial intercourse with foreign nations. The science of statistics is to the political economist and legislator, what natural history is to the mechanical philosopher and to the chemist. It collects, arranges, compares, and classifies for them the materials which form the basis of their respective sciences. It does not profess to investigate causes, to reason on probable results, nor to unfold those general principles which should govern our legislative or commercial enactments; but it collects and arranges those facts which constitute the materials by which we may arrive at correct conclusions respecting our social and political go

vernment.

Considered under this point of view, the standard or model book which Mr. Kingsley has caused to be printed for the information of the County Treasurers of Ireland, is a most valuable gift to the science of statistics. It suggests important improvements in the classification and arrangement of grand jury taxation and expenditure, by the adoption of which the County Treasurers of Ireland, instead of the confused and imperfect books, which they at present print after each assize, for the information of the contractors and rate-payers, will now be enabled to present the fiscal details of their several counties in a manner far more comprehensive and perspicuous. The model book also contains various additions to the grand jury statistics, which do not form a part of the books now published by the County Treasurers. The value of Mr. Kingsley's book does not, however, rest here; it classes and arranges the taxation and expenditure of a county in such a man

ner,

that we have before us at one view the amount of each and every department, separately, brought before us; so that when this model book is adopted by the different County Treasurers, which, we doubt not, will soon be the case, we shall then be enabled to as

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certain and to compare the expenditure of one county with that of another, and see how much was laid out on roads, hospitals, bridges, &c.; the expenses of witnesses attending on criminal trials; the debt which a county to government, an important piece of information which no treasurer's book now affords; the loss incurred for malicious injuries to property, and the expense of the police, &c. so as to have a knowledge of the relative cost of these various itens, not alone as compared with each other in any particular county, but also as when compared with similar items in other counties. A treasurer's book such as this is, would also afford to parliament various knowledge of the fiscal details of a county, which it has now no means of acquiring. In addition to this, Mr. Kingsley's model book contains various statistical tables, exhibiting the amount and character of crime, malicious injury to property, the returns of coroners, including the verdicts of the juries, the county debts account, &c. Α volume of statistics collated from the county books, constructed on this model, would afford to the legislature far more accurate and authentic information on these several heads, than is now obtained through the medium of returns; in fact, the general adoption of this book would supersede, in a great measure, the necessity of moving for various returns altogether, it being proposed by Mr. Kingsley that this volume should be printed, so as to be in the hands of the Irish members on the opening of the session, as it would contain within itself all the required information; and being published and circulated through the several counties, it would not venture to suppress or to misrepresent what had occurred.

Strange to say, Mr. Kingsley has met with every difficulty, and every obstacle has been thrown in his way, in carrying his useful suggestions into effect. All his overtures were received with coldness by the several grand juries, before whom they were laid; and we understand that some of them were under the erroneous impression that Mr. Kingsley was endeavouring to promote some sinister measure for the government, whilst he was in truth

Standard Book for the County Treasurers of Ireland. By Jeffries Kingsley, Esq. M. R.I.A., A.C.E.I., Lieutenant of 3rd Dragoons. 4to. pp. 70, and several statistical tables. Dublin: Printed by Graisberry, 1837.

conferring a great national benefit, and without any concomitant emolument or remuneration to himself. The result has fully proved how fallacious were these impressions, and has shown that however the barefaced system of jobbing, pursued by the Irish government and their efforts to convert every thing into a source of patronage, may have justified such a supposition in the mind of a grand juror towards the castle, to our author it does not apply. In fact, the mode of placing the state of crime before the public, as proposed by him, would have completely put aside those mystified and garbled statements, which Lord Normanby was not ashamed to put forward in his place in the House of Lords.

Mr. Kingsley, receiving no countenance from the different grand juries, was at length happily led to submit his standard book to the Royal Dublin Society, of which he is a member. It was by that body referred to a special committee, consisting almost altogether of grand jurors, who entered into a minute investigation of the various details, respecting the fiscal administration of the counties, and of the County Treasurer's books. The following is the report made to the society, drawn up, we presume, by the pen of Doctor Meyler, its chairman; and it is remarkable for the variety of matter, condensed and lucidly arranged, in so small a compass :

"At a meeting of the Royal Dublin Society, for the promotion of husbandry and other useful arts in Ireland, at their house, Kildare-street, on Thursday, December 22nd, 1836, Sir Robert Shaw, Bart. V. P. in the chair,

"Doctor Meyler presented a report from the Committee of Accounts, appointed to consider Mr. Kingsley's proposed statistical arrangement, for an uniform system in the expenditure by grand juries of Ireland.

"Your committee, in pursuance of the reference of the 17th November last, have had several conferences with Mr. Kingsley on his new system of grand jury accounts; and having maturely considered the subject, they are now enabled to lay before the society the following report:

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"Mr. Kingsley laid before the committee the books of nearly all the counties of Ireland, and on a careful examination of them, we in the first place have to observe, that they follow no uniform sys. tem, as compared with each other, and that they differ not alone in their arrangement, but also in the nature and amount of the information which they afford.

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Some county books set forth the taxes levied in the form of APPLOTMENT

TABLES; they give also the presentments, the unexecuted contracts, and the treasurer's account; others give no applot

ment tables; some omit the unexecuted contracts; and others do not publish the

accounts of the treasurer.

"Your committee will now observe on the manner in which the different county books detail the grand jury proceedings, and in the first place they have to remark, that in so important a question as the taxation of the county, very few of these books afford precise information. Some contain regular applotment tables, including the number of acres, and acreable rates of each barony, but omit the arrears and treasurer's warrants.

In

others the number of acres in each barony is given, but not the acreable rates; whilst some give the acreable rates, but not the number of acres. Other books merely mention the gross amount of the taxes on each barony, and some county books actually give no applotment tables whatsoever.

"The PRESENTMENTS constitute the next division of a county book. Under this head are comprehended the different sums paid by the county treasurer, under the direction of the grand jury.

"These presentments admit of two divisions. In the one, is the precise amount for contracts, which have been duly executed and accounted for. In the other may be included the ready-money expenditure for prisoners, and other contingencies; the expenses of which cannot, in the first instance, be accurately ascertained, and for which a conjectural sum is presented, which in general leaves a surplus in the hands of the treasurer.

"The presentments, as given in the county books, are totally deficient in arrangement. Presentments for roads, hospitals, bridges, prisons, dispensaries, and malicious injuries, &c. are promiscuously set forward; and appear again and again in different pages of the books, opposing great difficulties in the way of reference and classification.

"In general the county books give the amount of the presentments in regular columns, in some the sums are added up; in others this is omitted. In some there are no columns to receive the amount of the different presentments; and those

who seek for information on this matter, must search through all the presentments, extract the several amounts, item by item, and add them up.

"The contracts entered into by the grand jury, and which have not been fulfilled on the part of the contractor, form the third division of a county book. These are called UNDISCHARGERD OR RESPITED These should, in a most especial manner, be precisely put forth, inasmuch as the money to discharge these contracts has been levied off the county, and paid to the treasurer at least two days before the assizes.

QUERIES.

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The contracts, when not regularly accounted for before the grand jury, are not presented for, and the money levied for their discharge remains in the hands of the treasurer. This balance, according to the usage of different counties, may so remain, in whole or part, for one or more years; and on referring to parliamentary returns, we find that the amount held by the different treasurers varies from blank to £16,000.

"This renders it the more necessary, that the county should be enabled to ascertain what contracts have been executed and paid for, and what balance remains in the treasurer's hands for contracts unfulfilled; and yet there is no part of a county book which opposes so many dif ficulties to inquiry, arising chiefly from the manner in which the undischarged queries are mixed up with the applotments, the presentments, and the trea

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"Some treasurers specifically mention the surplus arising from the undischarged queries in their balance sheet; others do not; and when this is omitted, it is in all cases difficult, and in some impossible,

to ascertain how the treasurer stands with the county. Some books give no treasurer's account, nor even a balance sheet.

"Your committee, in thus observing on the treasurer's accounts, beg leave to add, that they do not in the least possible degree, mean to question their accuracy, or to insinuate that they are incorrect, because they have been confusedly and imperfectly given or altogether withheld; and they are aware that they are in all

cases investigated by the grand jury. But they feel themselves warranted in saying, that it is due alike to the grand jury and to the public, that the treasurer's accounts should be precise, clear, and comprehensive; and that each county is entitled to expect from the proper authorities, a full and accurate detail of its taxation and expenditure.

"The model of

county book, submitted to the committee by Mr. Kingsley, is free from the defects already enumerated, and possesses also many peculiar excellencies; and its admirable arrangement affords many facilities for obtaining a great variety of valuable and statistical information. In Mr. Kingsley's book there is a table exhibiting, under one view, regularly arranged, the entire expenditure and revenue of the county. Were the different grand juries to adopt this book, the aggregate of these tables would constitute a statistical document, affording to parliament far more precise and accurate information than it now receives from the returns annually made to it by the county treasurers.

"ANTHONY MEYLER, Chairman."'

"Resolved-That this report be printed in the minutes: and that the table annexed to it be printed as an appendix to the proceedings."-(Appendix, No. II.),

Our readers will see from the foregoing report, how much such a work, as the one now under consideration, was required; and that it is not an overcharged statement on the part of the Dublin Society, is evident from this fact, that though it went the rounds of the metropolitan and provincial press, in no one instance has its accuracy been impeached.

The different improvements sug gested by our author, and referred to in the report of the Royal Dublin Society, do not admit of being specially detailed in a publication such as ours. To be appreciated, the model book with the various county treasurer's books itself must be referred to, and compared as they are now, and have hitherto been, printed.

The grand jury system is perhaps one of the most complicated departments of the public service. It contains not less than thirty-one distinct branches of expenditure; and the poor rates, now about to be added, will form another most important item, which, in an eminent degree, will require to be fully and lucidly put forward in the county treasurer's books.

There is perhaps nothing more calculated to show the necessity and value

of the improvements now proposed to be effected in the county treasurer's books, than the singular fact, that even up to the present time, not one of the treasurer's books of the thirty-two counties give, in a distinct round sum, the debt which a county owes to the government.

To the clear understanding of this, it is necessary to state, that when a prison or any other public edifice is to be erected, the money for that purpose is advanced by the government; the money so borrowed to enable the county to meet this immediate and large outlay, instead of being refunded at once, is repaid by half yearly instalments, until the debt is liquidated. These items are technically called government advances; from two to five of which are usually in course of repayment in each county.

A practical man of business would expect to find, in every county book, a simple and distinct account, setting forth the original sum borrowed, to what purpose it had been applied, the proportions of the sum which had been discharged, and the amount of debt which the county owed on these transactions.

In the model book there is a distinct formula, where all the details of the several sums due by a county to the government, are minutely and accurately given. It, of course, could not be expected, nor indeed wished, that we should advert more circumstantially than we have already done, to these several matters of fiscal arrangement, and we shall confine our remaining observations to what relates to the statistics of crime.

It will, however, be in the first instance necessary to lay before our readers the sources from which the criminal returns are now made to parliament. These returns proceed from five different quarters. From the inspector-generals of prisons, in their prison reports; from the clerks of the crown and of the peace, in their committal returns; and from the petty sessions benches; from the crown solicitors who attend the assize courts to prosecute offenders; and lastly from the police. We shall now proceed serialim with each, commencing with the returns from the inspectors-general of prisons.

By the 7th Geo. IV. chap. 74, sec. 67, "The clerks of the crown for the assize court, and the clerks of the peace of the quarter sessions courts, are re

quired to furnish the inspectors of prisons of every county, county of a city, and County of a town, with a complete schedule of the several prisoners brought to trial, at such assizes, and at each and every quarter sessions, according to a form to be furnished to them by the inspectors-general of prisons, to make a general statement from such returns for the whole year."

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It may be necessary to inform some of our readers, that England, Scotland, and Ireland furnish returns which are annually laid before parliament, and which are published by order of the House of Commons. The books of the two former are entitled “Criminal Offenders," that of the latter Prison Reports." The prison reports of Ireland profess to follow the same uniform system with the criminal offenders of England and Scotland. The number of offenders who are imprisoned or bailed before the assize and quarter session courts, and those who are summarily convicted before the petty sessions tribunals are also inserted in the prison reports. A page is allocated to each of the thirty-two counties, and to the eight grand jury cities, in which separate assizes are held. Ninety-five different species of crime are enumerated in each page, with the convictions, the sentences, the commutations of punishment, and various other particu lars too numerous to be here detailed.

The prison reports of the inspectorsgeneral are in many respects defective. All the free pardons are not inserted. For example, in the prison reports for 1836, one hundred and ninety pardons were alone inserted for the whole of Ireland; whereas it appears from a parliamentary return, obtained by Sergeant Jackson, that several hundred convicts were liberated in that year by the summary mandate of the Lord Lieutenant. It appears from the same reports, that only 24 convicts were pardoned in Tipperary; whereas from a return, moved for by the same gentleman, it was stated that 124 convicts were let loose again, upon Tipperary alone, by Lord Normanby, and even without their being required to give bail, with the exception of three only.

Such discrepancies as these destroy all faith in the accuracy of such reports, and one would be led to believe, from the suppression of the extraordinary number of pardons, made without even reference to the usual authorities on such occasions, that His Excellency was unwilling, that the reckless use he

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