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"You shall go with me there this very blessed starry night," said the fiend, or Etrurian god, or whatever he was. Nay, I purpose to pay Utopia a flying visit also; and if we can compass it in the same half-hour, why should we not take a peep at the Nobodies-a people well worth knowing, who inhabit the island of Nowhere? The whole will not take us longer than it took the prophet to travel from Mecca to Jerusalem; thence to the seventh heaven, within two bow-shots of the throne; back to Jerusalem again, and from thence home to Mecca, where he arrived, as you very well know, before his bed was cold, or the pitcher was empty, which he overset in his haste to begin the journey."

It was impossible to help mentally contrasting my situation with Maho met's, who had a good angel to conduct him, and one of no less mark than Gabriel; but then I was not Mahomet

there was the difference; so to go being inevitable, I resolved to do it with a good grace, putting the best face on it, and my best leg foremost, as the saying is.

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"Ah, tempter!" I cried, "you come of a race of seducers; our mothers have told us what you did in their days ;no more lead on-I follow." fact, I was much in the situation of Launcelot Gobbo.

"Budge," said the fiend. "Budge not," said conscience.

In

The fiend carried it hollow with me, as with Launcelot.

"En route, then," cried he.

"Allons," quoth I, just to show him that I was as apt a French scholar as himself.

This time we were not mounted as we had been before; my companion had two pair of wings in his pouch, with one of which he kindly accommodated me. We struck out together into the blue fields of air, threw the invisible billows aside with lusty sinews, and stemmed them with hearts of controversy. My sensations during this entirely novel exercise are altoge

ther indescribable. All I can say is, that I felt curiously like a bird, and experienced what I can imagine to be the emotions of a soaring eagle. I was able to look the sun straight in the face, and felt as if it would have been no great exploit to snap up a young prince, or carry a thunderbolt in my bill.

"Wings," said I, "are glorious appendages of an intelligent being.'

"It was poor economy," said he, with his characteristic levity; "not to have provided your race with them."

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"Pardon me," I made bold to answer; we were neither intended for angels nor birds."

He was silenced by the remark, simple as it was, and never spoke again until we reached the uttermost verge of creation, and, looking back over our shoulders, like Lot's wife, saw the sun about half the size of the pole-star. We flew right between Saturn and his ring. Those are things to be seen, believe me, or you may abandon all hope of forming any accurate conception of them; as to trustworthy description, it would be the utmost folly to attempt it. The same is true of the astonishing belts that encircle the planet Jupiter. Imagine a great globe swathed with inconceivable bandages, in a manner which no language can convey the slightest notion of it-do you now understand? Clearer I cannot make it.

Away we sailed through a wilderness of worlds, until we looked back on the zodiac, as we did before on the sun, and saw the convex side of that magni. ficent girdle, broidered all over with blazing signs and wonders. Onward still, until we saw looming, or rather flaming in the distance, the form of a winged horse, delineated as it were with stars, just as the same figure might be wrought with spangles on silk or muslin. I easily recognised the superb constellation Pegasus.

"Hail, king of hobbies!" cried my cicerone; and soon explained that we were now arrived at the frontier of the region we were bound for. In fact, we were already in view of the poet's hobby; and a most noble and high-mettled steed it seemed to be, though its back was hardly broad enough for the multitudes of equestrians of both sexes, who either rode or aspired to ride it. They clung to every part of the animal, clustered like bees in the mane, hung by his tail, and held on by his fetlocks.

We observed some of the rhymers and organ-grinders of our own acquaintance clambering up his sides, mistaking his neighings, which were all in disdain, for signs of favour and encouragement. Indeed, while we were looking on, two of the most forward of our modern bardlings were left sprawling on their backs; one whose name I have already forgotten, had the folly to pat the immortal beast, as a girl might her favourite pony; the other was the enterprising Warren, whom nothing would serve but to warble a stanza of his own "Lily and Bee," while his foot was in the stirrup-why, the steadiest, best-tempered steed that ever carried man, demigod, or devil, could not have stood it. The fall he got would have been fatal, if he had not providentially fallen on his head, which, owing to the materials of which it was composed, was invulnerable as the heel of Achilles.

Pressing forward into the interior, I was, indeed, strongly reminded of the vast herds of wild horses described by the travellers who have traversed the Pampas.

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Pity," said I, "we are not provided with lassos !"

"Think you I set out for HobbyLand without them?" said the fiend, producing as he spoke a brace of lassos from the same pouch which had contained the wings.

The spectacle was the drollest that the eye ever rejoiced in. Far as the sight could reach, the vast spectral plain or aerial prairie was covered with equestrians, gentle and simple, male and female, old and young, pleasing and repulsive, of all nations, languages and ages of the world; in truth, it was a mob, in which it was very difficult at first to identify or distinguish any particular figure. My own grandfather rode up close to my elbow on that pretty hobby of his, with whose singular pranks I had been so often diverted, and I did not at first recognise the old gentleman. After some time, I found that almost all my relations and friends were trotting about in one part of the field or another; and what made the sight more entertaining was this, that in the majority of cases the hobbies were precisely the objects or fancies which the riders had made themselves remarkable or ridiculous for carressing in the world of fact. Thus my grandsire had not long passed when up came my grandmother, on a thorough

bred tortoise-shell cat; and not far behind her was a lady of the present generation, mounted on a Cochin-China cock, which was, indeed, so pleasant a vision that my friend of the pen and bottle went off again into one of his immoderate fits of laughter. Indeed, the number who rode the same species of fashionable fowl was very considerable, though some did not confine themselves to a single bird, but rode two or three at a time, as they do in the circus. I also recognised several fair equestrians on macaws, parrots, Italian greyhounds, squirrels, and even little pigs, and not a few upon high. mettled monkeys, whose caprioles and sprightly curvets would have overset gravity itself. These were generally in little groups or parties, and there seemed to have been made a sort of special ride for them, a kind of Rottenrow, or a tolerable representation of it. The last I observed was a lady whom I very well knew, on a prancing Skye terrier. She rode it, I am bound to say, with inimitable grace and spirit, and made it show its paces to perfection; but I soon lost sight of her in a cloud of her followers, still more oddly mounted, for they were not upon any sort of animal, but some upon bulbous roots (Dutch tulips, in all probability), some upon innocent hobbies of Bohemian glass and Sèvres porcelain; while a bevy of at least a hundred dames were hobbling away upon cracked old china teapots.

A race, which came off between two dowagers, mounted on these grotesque and fragile hobbies (the prize being a Nankin jug, without a handle or a nose), was the occasion of indescribable merriment, even to the crowd of equestrians themselves, occupied as they were with their own private pranks and performances. Indeed, I remarked in general that nothing seemed ever to distract the attention of any body in Hobby-Land from his own little special capriccio, but his ineffable contempt for that of his neighbour, or his keen enjoyment of his friends' follies. The ladies who rode the monkeys laughed immoderately at those on the tulip roots; who, in their turn, despised from the bottom of their hearts their companions on the backs of the poultry; while the latter looked positively indignant at the dowagers perched on the teapots, as they careered by them in the heat of the chase.

But the women, believe me, occupied no more than their fair proportion of the field; the other sex were quite as numerous, and as variously and oddly mounted. Indeed, the "mentis gratissimus error" (no bad Latin for hobby) was even more pronounced in the masculine than in the feminine gender.

My attention was next called to a regiment of pedagogues of the old school, most of them in clerical garb, and awfully wigged, riding cock-horse their own rods and ferules; their colonel was the celebrated Busby, on what was neither more nor less than an enormous broom-a small forest in itself. They were followed at some distance by a female troop of the same profession similarly mounted, their formidable airs and attitudes reminding one of the Amazons of ancient days, or the King of Dahomey's female guards, in our own times. Some of the keenest of the schoolmistresses were in chase of a few innocent little truants, mounted on the regular wooden hobby-horses of our toy-shops, and hard enough was it for them to escape the hunters, by going at the pace the French call ventre-à-terre.

The spectacle seemed to improve in singularity every moment. Saints and angels! what were these now coming towards us? There seemed to be no difference between rider and horse-it was cavalry on cavalry, or rather dragoon upon dragoon; in fact, as they came nearer, we found this was actually the case-it was impossible to discriminate the steed from the horseman, or the horseman from the steed. I was utterly lost in amazement, and turned bewildered to my companion for an explanation.

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Simple enough," he replied, after indulging in another prodigious cachinnation, well justified truly by the phenomenon before us. 66 'Simple enough!

the miserable caitiffs you see are riding their own precious selves; these are the egotists, you must know—the “sui amantes sine rivali," the self-admirers, self-lovers self-idolaters, in short; each is his own hobby. Not a person in that immense cavalry regiment but flatters himself that he is mounted upon nothing less than one of the horses of the Sun. Each sees plainly enough what despicable hacks the rest are astride on, but thinks his own beast the most delicate bit of horseflesh in the world."

"That is very evident," said I. "No Arab of the desert ever made such a pet of his horse as these wretches do of their beastly, contemptible, rascally selves."

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"Yahoo on yahoo," shouted the fiend. See how they stroke their own backs and pamper their own stomachs! Talk of the extravagance of maternal affection! Did the silliest of mothers, in the extremity of fondness and very dotage, ever so caress, fondle, or make so much of a worth. less lout of a son, as these selfish varlets do of their own proper persons, or visible impersonations?"

"Observe," I said, "how they spare the whip; Sancho or Hudibras was not more tender to his own cuticle."

It was a hint to the fiend, who instantly commenced heartily slashing and scourging those nearest to him with the rope of his lasso, making no distinction between the hobbler and the hobby-for, indeed, there was none to make the former raising as loud a yell when the latter was hit, as if he had felt the rope on his own shoulders.

The lasso soon put the whole lumbering troop to flight. It was a relief to the eye when they were gone; for a more offensive, as well as ridiculous and awkward squad, it is impossible for imagination to conceive. Alas! however, their numbers surpassed belief. There were enough of them to people three-quarters of the globe; this being evidently, of all varieties of the hobby, the most extensive and the most in vogue.

Not many minutes later I was actually in some personal danger.

"Fly! fly!" I called out to my comrade; I am observed, I am discovered; they will again be the death of me, as many a time they have been before."

There never was a narrower escape than I had from my old enemies - the "bores of my acquaintance," who were there to a man, organised, I believe, into a sort of guild or corpora tion, for they were all collected together, and seemed to be acting in concert. There was the hypochondriac astride on the identical pair of scales which he was wont to carry in his pocket, lest he should chance to eat a grain or scruple more bread at his breakfast, or beef at his dinner, than he was allowed by his self-imposed sanatory regulations. There was my

Quidnunc flying all abroad upon a pair of wings formed of the broad sheets of The Times newspaper, and bawling the latest scrap of news from Constantinople. There was my literary torment bestraddling a long roll of MSS., which he would certainly have inflicted on me, had he overtaken me. There was the naturalist, also, on his entomological hobby, no other than a mighty flea (as huge as that which Panurge wore in his ear-ring), with a proboscis like that of a young elephant. The whole corps of Fâcheux were upon me, animated with their original malignity— doubtless, not a little increased by their rage at the exposure I was so rash as to make of some of them in these very columns, many a fair moon since.

Narrow, indeed, was my escape from them. An escape it was, trulynot from one death, but from a thousand. When I was recovered from my fright, we were in a somewhat more retired and quiet corner of the region.

My guide called my attention to a figure in a naval unform, who was managing, with no great address, something on which he was seated astride, with a conceited, assuming air, obviously anxious to concentrate the attention of all the row upon himself. This proved to be no other than Captain Warner on his notorious hobby, the Long Range. At first, the ladies were thrown into consternation when they heard he was coming; but they soon saw that the beast was an innocent poor creature; and some of them, to the Captain's great annoyance, caressed it as they passed, and even looked down the animal's throat,

Who should ride by next, but a most respectable, but unwieldy old gentleman, whom I knew, the moment I saw him, to be the venerable Joseph Hume, upon that well-known Scotch hack of his, Economy, out of Cheeseparing, by Pennywise, out of Poundfoolish. Corpulent as he was, there was a Quixotic air about him; and this was improved by the circumstance that he was followed by his squire Williams, nicknamed Smollet by the Parliamentary wags, being a sorry "continuation of Hume." Close at their heels was another legislator, who, seen at a distance, looked like Orson in the legend, or a moving bush, as if "Birnam wood was coming to Dunsinane in earnest. But he was soon near enough to be recognised by any one

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who had ever seen him before. hardly say it was the grisly and gallant Sibthorpe. His lance was in the rest, and he was in full tilt at the Crystal Palace, a phantom of which was, no doubt, standing before him, and exciting him to frenzy.

"Now for the lasso," cried my comrade; and, in good sooth, it was time to arrest the Colonel's progress, for he was dashing right into the Bohemian glass and the old china, probably taking them for the object of his antipathy, or one of its wings.

The loop was flung; and so adroitly, though invisible, that the Lincoln knight on his hobby lay sprawling the next instant, biting the dust like one of Homer's heroes. Another moment, and the same dexterous hand pulled out an enormous pair of shears, and left the brave Colonel's chin as smooth as Apollo's. The fiend tossed it into the air, where it looked exceedingly like a meteor, as it streamed to the wind; and was taken by the terrestrial astronomers for the tail of a comet, the same which people caught colds gazing at no later than last September. I overheard Squire Williams characteristically whispering to the knight, his master, that it was a shame to waste so much good hair, which would have stuffed an excellent mattress.

The fate of Sibthorpe was a warning to Mr. Muntz, who was not far off at the time. The Birmingham hero, whose bush was quite as tempting, seeing what befell the Colonel, rode away, full speed, on his indefatigable Currency nag, and was soon out of sight.

Presently there" came pricking o'er the plain," a form more dignified and respectable than any I had yet observed. My less reverential companion would again have thrown his lasso ; but I held his arm, and the gentle knight passed forward unmolested- a forbearance which his noble philanthropy and strain of true chivalry justly claimed for him. It was Lord Dudley Stuart on his generous Polish steed.

"Besides," said I, "we shall, doubtless, meet with far better game presently. Recollect we have not yet come up with your Edinburgh jockeys; I wonder where the deuce they can be." "Probably giving chase to Warner," said he.

It was even so, as a thundering sound from afar soon convinced us, being no other than the din and up

roar occasioned by Bright on his Bucephalus and Cobden on his cob, making after the Knight of the Long Range, who fled before them into all corners of the Pampas.

Certainly there was never a more magnificent pair of hobbies bred in a stable than the two enthusiasts, now approaching in full gallop, had under them. The name of Bright's was Peace; that of Cobden, Arbitration. Bright, being a disciple of William Penn, wore a jacket of drab, and, instead of the jockey's cap, the broad brim of his community; such a turn-out as was never seen on the turf before. Sir Cobden was cased in printed calico -the costume, no doubt, of the days of the League.

"Fine animals," quoth I, as they came near (meaning the hobbies, I entreat you to understand).

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Chargers, you observe," said the fiend; "regular war-horses-particularly Friend Bright's, who richly deserves to be read out of meeting.'

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"And pray remark," I rejoined, "how much more noise their hobbies make than the Captain's, who is a man of war by profession, and rides that huge piece of ordnance."

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They make a d-l of a clatter between them," said he; "there was never heard the like since the ghost of Guido Cavalcanti pursued the spectre-maid with his hell-dogs, in the pineforests of Ravenna."

"Hold," I exclaimed, interrupting him; "they will overtake poor Warner, if you are not expeditious; and assuredly he will be torn to pieces, or they will annihilate him with their olive cudgels."

Which will you have?" cried he. "Friend Bright, by all means." The lasso flew. You never saw an experter cast; it would have charmed poor Basil Hall, or Mayne Reid, who understands this sort of thing perfectly.

Cobden made his escape; Bright rolled in the dust at our feet, bellowing like a bull of Basan. The fiend gave me the hobby to hold; but the creature was so vicious, notwithstanding his gentle name, and made such attempts to kick my shins, that I had a great mind to let him go. However, I managed to hold him for a few minutes long enough to give my com

panion time to thrash his master with his own olive branch, which he did most lustily, dusting his drab jacket, to the infinite joy of men and angels. You have no notion what a deal of thrashing a shadow will bear without being much the worse for it five minutes after. This done, my compa nion took the rope of his lasso and secured the crest-fallen Quaker Mazeppa-wise on the back of his charger; then administering a sound kick to the latter, a parte post, he dismissed the horse and the rider with more execrations than ever Lear poured on his daughters.

"Perhaps the poor devil is sincere, after all," I could not help saying, feeling some little twinge of commiseration for the unlucky preacher of peace.

"If he is sincere," said my friend, sharply, "he is only the more mischievous, and better deserves what he has got; but the deuce a grain of sincerity there is in him, any more than in his brother who has escaped. The lads are as hollow as a pair of kettle-drums, or they would never make the infernal noise they do in the world."

Charity was not to be expected from his lips: so I let his intolerant opinions pass unrebuked.

"We have outstaid our time," said I; "let us wing our way back to earth."

"And reserve the Utopians and Nobodies for another flight? Agreed!"

Crossing the borders again, I saw one or two hobbies of elder times. There was Ulysses cocked on the wooden horse Diogenes astride on his tub Socrates on the back of his demon; and, coming down to the middle ages, the very last object of curiosity that engaged our attention was no less a personage than Mahomet himself, scudding through the air on that mysterious animal, Borak, the identical beast that carried him to Jerusalem on that ever-memorable night of which we were speaking just now.

We must have made quite as good dispatch as the Prophet of Araby; for I had just directed a billet-doux to Corinna before I started, and when I returned, the ink was not yet dry with which I had written her laureled

name.

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